


Delicate

by Frannimbap



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Angst, Childhood Friends, Eventual Romance, F/M, HP: EWE, Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-04-27 22:09:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 41,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14435139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frannimbap/pseuds/Frannimbap
Summary: Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Except for plays and musicals, this is my first story. English is not my first language, so I'm really sorry for any mistakes I make.

The sun was rising with every minute that passed by as Hermione sat at her desk, two weeks earlier. She was working on her tenth- no, thirteenth draft of what she called, a letter to Theodore Nott. She wrote the letter traditionally, without magic. Inside her room, you could only hear the sound of her quill working its way through the letter. While she was writing, her sun kissed hazelnut hair fell over her shoulders, putting it back in place every now and then. She sighed, rumpled the letter and threw it into the bin. Her face sunk into her hands. What was so hard about this letter? She wrote letters everyday, she was good with words, she was brilliant with words. But not today, no.

It’s been three years since she left London and the English wizard community thus leaving her friends and family. But after going to university in California and working for the Magical Congress of the United States her muggle therapist suggested that she was ready to face her fears.

Once again she took her quill and wrote:  
  
_Dear Theodore,_  
it’s been a long time since we talked and I hope you’ve been well.  
I know things between us were really complicated in the last couple of years but you’re still the closest thing I have to family.  
If, by chance, I happen to come back, is there a room at the Nott estate that I could use while looking for a new apartment?  
  
Your’s sincerely,  
Hermione Granger  
  
She thought of the last time she talked to Theodore. Her words were harsh and mean and her heart full of anger. She was angry at everyone. Theodore, Harry, Ginny, Ron, the Order, Dumbeldore and even at those whohad died. It was hard to breath at that moment and she did something that was not typical for her. She fled. Out of rainy Britain into sunny California.

Without giving it another thought and without the chance to throw another letter into the bin, she went to the window that faced the little garden behind her apartment and blew into a little whistle. Shortly after, a small brown owl appeared at her window sill.  
  
„Good day Rosa, please bring this letter to Theodore Nott."  
  
Hermione sticked the letter to Rosa's leg and gave her a treat before she sent her off into the cloudless sky. It took a load off her mind that was quickly replaced with a queasy feeling. Theodore was by far not as complicated as Hermione and far less conflicted. Even at their time in Hogwarts, he was mostly nice to her while the other Slytherins teased and bullied her.  
  
Today, Hermione sat on the windowsill and looked down at a small glass ball. She got it when she had bought Rosa and with it she could always see where the owl was right now. When the wind blows right the bird would arrive in the early evening hours and because of that she was nervous and excited at the same time. She turned her golden pendant between her fingers as a knock, followed by the sound of the door opening, brought her back into the present.  
  
„Hermione, I’m going to the city, do you want to come along and eat something?“ A blond man with freckles and green eyes sticked his head through the door. A charming smile on his lips. He was tall and tanned, a shirt of some Muggle Band Hermione didn’t know tightly fitting around his broad shoulders matched with his favorite pair of vans. He was well known for his looks. Once or twice when they went into the city, talent scouts were trying to get him for their agencies. Hermione was pretty sure, there is a place in heaven for people like Matthew, that are not aware of their charm.  
  
„ Oh, Thank you Matthew but I’m going to meet a friend for lunch today.“ She rose from her desk and walked through the room to grab her purse from her bed.  
  
„You sure? How about you cancel your date and we grab some burritos and go to the beach?“  
  
„I’m going to meet Harry.“ Hermione lifted a brow at him.  
  
„You choose the chosen one over your best friend? I’m shocked!“ Matthew made a dramatic gasp and crossed his arms in front of his chest.  
  
„Nope, Harry _is_ my best friend.“ She rolled her eyes and put her mobile phone into her bag.  
  
Matthew and Hermione met at college and started working together for the Magical Congress of the United States of America. He was like California. Sunny, warm and lighthearted. When she was looking for a place to stay she found his advert at the social board in the wizard part of her college in Los Angeles. She called him right away but lied about her name and origin because she was afraid that the wrong people heard about it. Her worries were forgotten when she learned that the only thing Matthew knew about the second wizard war was that it has something to do with a guy named Harry Potter.  
  
Hermione liked him a lot. For a wizard and pureblood Matthew was really into muggle art and artistic stuff in general. She tried to act annoyed by his nosy, straight forward character but she enjoyed his company a lot.  
  
„So I guess you already decided whether you want to go back to London or stay.“  
  
Hermione was quiet for a second and turned back to face Matthew. He frowned.  
  
„Well, it was what I had planned to do from the beginning….to return as soon as I feel better again."  
  
Matthew sighed and turned to leave, he made a grimace.  
  
„Go and meet your friend Hermione, I’ll support all your decisions…gosh, it’s so hard to look for a new roommate! And now I have to buy something to wear for when I visit you in cold, rainy London! I need a margarita to get over this!“ His hand on his forehead he left with a dramatic pose. He’s such a drama queen, Hermione thought. But that’s what she liked about him.

~*~*~

Harry was waiting at a café in Santa Monica. He was wearing a blue t-shirt with white stripes, jeans and sunglasses,. His hair was messy but she knew that he spent a good time to make it look like that. What an odd picture, Hermione thought. So young and carefree and all in all different from the images burned into her eyes. The images of a boy that went into the woods to die four years ago. When Harry saw her across the street he stood from his chair and pushed his sunglasses up. He smiled above the mouth.  
  
„Hermione, it’s so good to see you!“ Within a few steps Hermione was in Harrys embrace, smiling from cheek to cheek.  
  
„I’m so glad you made it Harry! It’s been ages since we saw each other!“  
  
Harry loosed his embrace but reached to hold Hermione’s hand and lead her to the chair next to him. The feeling of his hand in her’s made her wonder if he was afraid that she would flee once again.  
  
„Definitely. I wouldn’t miss the chance to see you. How are you? What about your studies, is everything going as planned? You look really good, Mione! Everyone sends their regards to you!“  
  
Hermione chuckled and squeezed his hand. Being with Harry was so easy. The waitress arrived and when she came back with their lunch they were so deep into their conversation that all worries were vanished.  
  
When Harry finished his sandwich, Hermione folded her serviette and took a deep breath.  
  
„I’m coming back. To London. Tonight.“  
  
Harry blinked and looked into her brown eyes. Her eyes flickered between his, unsure what to expect. What if it’s too soon? What if there’s no space for her anymore? The golden trio. The golden duo. She read the Daily Prophet, she saw the headlines. „Where’s the Golden Girl?“, „Heartbroken in California, fall of a war heroine“. But Harry smiled and his eyes were full of kindness.  
  
„Oh, that’s wonderful news, Hermione! You can’t believe how happy I am!“ She felt his hand at her underarm and she blinked "Do you know where you want to stay? Ginny and I can prepare a guest room at Grimmauld Place if you like.“

„That’s really kind but I already asked Theodore if I can stay with him.“  
  
Harry narrowed his green eyes at this.  
  
„You sure? I thought you wanted to let the past be.“  
  
She looked away and fixed a spot over his right shoulder.  
  
„Yes, that’s what I actually wanted but I think I need to face it. I’m at a point where it’s all or nothing.“  
  
Her eyes wandered back into his, hoping for him to understand. And he did.  
  
„Of course. You know what you need to do. I mean, you’re the brightest witch of our age, right?“ He laughed and drank from his water. „And have you told Ron about this?“  
  
„No. I don’t think that he would be too happy about it…“ Hermione looked at her hands. It was awkward to talk about Ron with Harry. He was too biased.  
  
„Well, since we’re already talking about good news, there’s something else I wanted to talk about.“  
  
„Sure, what is it?“ Hermione was relieved that he changed the topic.  
  
„You know, I thought about it for a long time but I wanted to talk to you about it first. Because you’re my best friend and you’re also a girl.“ He plucked at the tablecloth and looked into his water. „I really want to propose to Ginny. Soon. And I think I need your help once she said yes.“  
  
Suddenly the anger was back. But she was smart enough to keep it quiet, to send it back into the lost part in her heart. She pushed her fingernails into her hand.

„Oh, that’s lovely Harry! To be honest I wondered why you haven’t done it yet. I’m sure Ginny will go head over heels!“ Breath, Hermione thought. Breath. You’re happy. You have to be happy. Do it for him.  
  
„You think so?“ He smiled that smile that reminded her of the young boy she met at the Hogwarts Express.  
  
„Absolutely, Harry. I will do everything I can to help you. You deserve this.“ The knot in her stomach was gone. She felt oxygen flowing into her lungs.  
  
„I’m so glad to hear this! You know that I’m not good with all this stuff and social gatherings and so on so if you would like to help me with the preparations for my proposal, we can start tomorrow, if you’re free!“ He grinned but there was something else in his eyes.  
  
„Everything. What is it?“ She relaxed a bit and gave him a smile.  
  
„I’m going to attend a charity ball from a really generous witch, called Lydia Frey. Do you heard from her?“  
  
Hermione thought about the latest articles that she read. A blond man with grey eyes came to light in her memory but she pushed him away. There she was, Lydia Frey. Two weeks ago. „She’s famous for her jewelry, right?“  
  
Harry clapped into his hands „Yes, exactly! She donated a lot to my charity project and I would like to get in touch with her. I hope I can persuade her into making our engagement rings."  
  
„Wow, there’s someone you need to convince to do something for the boy who lived?“  
Hermione knew that the name Potter was like a spell. All doors in the world would open if Harry asked them to do so.  
  
„She retired a few years ago and puts me off every time I send her an owl. But I don’t want her apprentice to manufacture it. Molly’s wedding ring was made by her and I want Ginnys to be the same.“ He seemed to be quite nervous. Harry is well known for his frugality and he seems to be embarrassed to be so fussy about stuff like this.  
  
„Well, I thought I could avoid a dramatic performance for my comeback but this is important to you and I can’t let you ruin things. Skeeter will be delighted.“ She smiled honestly. Her last wizard party was some months ago and the wizard community in America is not half as tory as the one in England.  
  
Harry chuckled. „I promise you that they will not believe their eyes. I can see the headlines: HARRY POTTER WITH MYSTERIOUS BEAUTY! WHO IS THIS SUN KISSED WOMAN?“ He made an exaggerated pose and Hermione couldn’t help herself but laugh. This wasn’t what she had planned but it was a statement after all.  
  
„Send me the address and floo network and I’ll be there in time.“  
  
Harry winked at her and Hermione paid the bill. He insisted to pay for their lunch but she told him that it was his turn when they were back in London. He held her tight as they said their goodbyes at the apparition point.

~*~*~

Back in her flat she found Rosa tapping impatient at her window. She let her in and watched how the bird flew a little circle before dropping a silver envelope sticked to a little package in front of her feet. The dark wax seal with the oh-so familiar Nott runes gave the author away. and Hermiones heart dropped to her knees. With quite shaky hands she opened it and read:  
  
_Dearest Mione,_  
  
My house is yours.  
Use the portkey to drop by, your new room is waiting for you and I can’t wait to see you again.  
  
Yours sincerely,  
Theo  
  
She unwrapped the package and found an old book from the Nott library about houselfs and pureblood relations set as a portkey.  
Hermione smiled and waved her wand. Her trunk opened and filled itself with all her belongings.  
  
So, it was settled.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your support!

Wrapped in light, Hermione found herself at her destination. She needed to blink a few times to know where she was, but with every second the contours of her surroundings became clearer. The Nott estate was exactly how Hermione remembered it. Dark.   
  
Nearly all curtains were pulled together and only a little bit of moonlight was finding its way into the house. To her left and right large windows lined the walls and Hermione remembered how she visited the Nott family for the first time.  
  
_She was four years old and her mother had only passed away recently. Her father was concerned because he didn’t know what to do with a child on his own and so he brought her with him to a meeting with Elmer Nott, the heir of the Nott family. Hermione held her father’s big hand and felt very uncomfortable in the dress her governess picked for her and the ridiculous way in which they tried to tame her mane didn’t help at all. She knew that her father wanted her to behave and so she focused her big, round eyes on the gate. The least thing she wanted was to disappoint him. No,she wanted to be allowed to stay by his side and learn well, everything a four-year-old girl could possibly learn. She stretched her neck to look at her father. Gilford Granger was a serious man with a tender heart and brown, spare hair. His eyes were brown like Hermione's and when he laughed, his eyes squinted so much that they seemed to disappear._   
  
Carefully, she dropped her leather trunk on the floor. Her years in Hogwarts were long over and it was scratched and blotchy in many places. But still, it accompanied Hermione through the seasons and years, through all her school years and when she decided to move to California. She led her eyes wander through the entrance hall in which she used to play hide and seek or tag with Theodore before they were caught by his father, scarring them away.  
  
_Her governess had told her that Elmer Nott had a son at her age called Theodore, Hermione did not know much about the complicated pedigrees of the wizarding world but he seemed to be a cousin of her, and she was curious to meet him since she didn’t really met any other kids her age yet. The gate opened with a loud noise and Hermione swallowed hard. Her father squeezed her little hand.  
_  
_„Don’t be afraid Hermione. The Granger family needs to hold their heads up, no matter what beast they have to face.“ Gilfords eyes beamed at her and he smiled._   
  
_Hermione nodded and looked into the dark foyer that was only lighted by a few candles. The first person she saw was Elmer Nott. He was giant, with broad shoulders. She thought that the only thing he had in common with her father was his age, nothing else. His eyes were hard and cold and even though he smiled it seemed liked he laughed about a joke only he knew. No, Hermione disliked him. Her eyes wandered and she met the glimpse of a young boy. His eyes were dark but awake, dancing between Hermione and her father._   
  
A sound pulled Hermione back and she turned to look into a pair of big round eyes

„Excuse me, did you say something?“ Hermione asked.  
  
„Yes Miss Granger. Lil wanted to know if she can show you your rooms.“In front of Hermione stood a little houself, dressed in something that once could have been a purple dress.She smiled shyly.  
  
„Oh, I’m so sorry Lil, I was lost in my thoughts. It would be wonderful if you could lead me the way.“ Hermione bit her tongue, how could she forget about Lil?   
  
Most pureblood families had to give up on their staff, since the new laws for pureblood’s wouldn’t allow families with an abusive elf history to keep them. But some elfs like Lil stayed and work with an employment agreement.  
  
„Please Miss Granger, don’t bother about Lil! Let Lil carry your trunk and follow me!“  
  
The elf snapped her little fingers and levitated the heavy trunk without effort on her side. Lil walked through the big foyer to the circular stairs on the right. Hermione followed her silently, feeling the looks of the moving portraits piercing her. It had always been strange to her that magicians enchanted pictures and photographs of the dead or the living, something her Muggle side just couldn't get used to.. Although her father was half-blooded, he rarely used magic and magical objects never found their way to their former house. Surely, they portraits condemned her for her heritage and origin and so she fixed her gaze on her feet. No. Her father would not have wanted her to be scared by dead men, so she raised her head and put a smile on her lips.  
  
Lil took the corridor on the second floor and turned left. Hermione sighed in relief when she saw that this part of the house was spared from moving art. They stopped in front of two red double doors and Hermione pushed secretly against the door, when Lil failed to open it.  
  
„This, Miss Granger is your new room. To the left you find your own bathroom and another tea room. Master Nott is out of town today and won’t be back until tomorrow. If there is anything Lil can do for you then please don’t hesitate to call her.“  
The little elf folded her hands in front of her and smiled.  
  
„Thank you Lil. I’ll let you know when I need something“ and as Hermione turned around to look at her, she was already gone.   
  
She took a deep breath and let the atmosphere take over.Obviously, Theodore has been inspired by the Gryffindor’s common room cause the entire room was bathed in dark red and brown tones. In the center of the room was a large four-poster bed with golden curtains and a dozen cushions. Instantly, she felt the urge to plunge into the soft sheets to catch up on her missed hours of sleep. To her left was a sofa corner with a matching side table and a large, but still empty, bookshelf.

First thing she did was to open all curtains and windows. The night would soon give away to tomorrow and she could see the first rays of sunshine making their way through the horizon. A cold breeze blew through her hair as she inhaled the smell of the woods. Nott estate was located in a beautiful glade, surrounded by trees older than the oldest paintings in this house. When they were children they used to play in the forrest or searched for unicorns and porlocks. She remembered how Pansy cried when they found pixies living in an old trunk as they tried to steal her hairband. Draco gave it back to her and they spent the rest of the day fighting against imaginary monsters. She fixed her gaze on a distant point somewhere on the horizon, not smiling while thinking about this memory.  
  
Exhausted from the events of the day she unpacked some of her things and crawled under the sheets of her temporary bed. Traveling by portkey is fast and easy but it’s also stressful and she felt the jet lag kicking in. She left California in the evening and missed a whole night of sleep. Before she had the chance to let her thoughts wander, a deep wave of sleep pulled her into the darkness of her mind.

~*~*~

_She stood on the battlefield. Tears running down her cheeks. Harry did it. They did it. Voldemort was defeated, the war was won. People around her kissed each other, embraced their friends and cried about those who died. She turned around and looked at Ron with his family. Harry was with Ginny, holding her hand tightly, spending her the comfort she needed. She watched as he moved his lips, slow and quiet. She turned to scan her surroundings. Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop and she wished she didn’t cared but she did. She cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she hadn't noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there, his back facing towards her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relieved or disappointed._

 

~*~*~

Hermione jolted out of her dream. Her left arm was burning. She blinked a few times and panicked before she remembered where she was. The sun was already streaming in through the windows as she gazed to the magical clock with a ridiculous amount of hands on the wall. It was already late in the afternoon and if she didn’t get up now, she would stay in bed the whole day. She sat upright and noticed that someone brought her breakfast, or lunch, or brunch, she wasn’t sure. The smell of coffee tickled her noise and she made a quick note to thank Lil for her service. Next to the tablet filled with croissants, buns and highly expensive looking porcelain laid a little stack of letters and the latest issue of the Daily Prophet. Hermione sighed and took the first envelope. News travel really fast.  
  
She overflew the first letter and her jaw dropped. Doubtfully, she reached for the second and the third, ripped them open with her index finger and scanned the content. To be honest, this was not what she expected. Every department in the Ministry of Magic has offered her a position of her choice from analyst of the Auror Headquarters to Public Relations. The last letter was sealed and written by minister Shacklebolt himself. He asked her for a meeting next Monday to discuss her future at the Ministry. He would love to know everything about her plans and what she would like to pursue. Hermione put a finger on her temple and wiped the letters from her lap.   
  
It took her a lot of strength to overcome the desire to ignore the Daily Prophet, but she knew there would be something she needed to know. There was no way that so many letters had reached her by coincidence although she didn't tell anyone where she was going. She hesitated before she reached for the newspaper and she screamed in horror when she saw her face on the front page.   
  
THE RETURN WE ALL WAITED FOR!   
Hermione Granger, war heroine and savior of the muggleborn was seen yesterday along with no other than Harry Potter! An insider from America told us that they enjoyed a cozy meal while talking about their future plans.  
  
Hermiones sighed indignantly. Did they write anything about Harry’s marriage proposal? She checked the rest of the article and exhaled. Thank godness. If Harry’s plans had been screwed because of her, she would have cut her ear off.   
  
There was also a photo of her sitting at the table with Harry. She was laughing at Harry and the look on her face was unfamiliar to Hermione. It was stupid to think that she could cut her link to the past. In California, Hermione had learned that you always carry a bit of your past with you. At times it’s just a gesture that you have taken from an old friend and sometimes it’s a feeling in your heart when you see something and you know it would please someone you love. The photo started again from the beginning and Hermione was reminded that her return was not quite that homely anymore.  
  
She had thought a lot about her return. She wanted it to be quiet and private without too much attention. She wanted to focus on her work and relationships before being exposedto the eye of the public. But she knew that if the community wanted a big entrance for her they'd give it to her. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and picked a croissant from the tablet.   
  
Her bare feet greeted the cold floor with every step she took towards the open windows.  
She was about to close it when she saw a brown-haired man on the path in front of the house.  
  
„THEODORE!“ Hermione called. She rested one hand on the windowsill, pushed her upper body out of the window and waved with the other.  
  
Theodore raised his head and beamed at Hermione. „Granger you bint! Come down and say hello to your favorite cousin!“  
  
Hermione did not hesitate. She turned and grabbed her robe before she hurried to the door and down the hall, barefoot.  
  
Theodore was waiting for her at the foot of the stairs and he spun her around in his arms when she arrived. He still looked like he used to. His hair was the clearest indication that they were related. The brown curls fell from his forehead into his face and his defined facial contours and perfect proportions had not aged a moment since she last saw him. When they were kids, they had always been the same size, but since their last years in Hogwarts Theodore towered over Hermione. His moss-green eyes were mottled brown near the iris and gazed down at her with joy. Like Hermione, Theodore had lost both parents and so he tried to hold on to the special bond they both had because not only was she his last remaining relative, but she also shared the same fate as he did.   
  
„What is the honor for me to welcome you in my house? Did you miss me so much or did you get a sunburn?“ He smirked this certain Slytherin smile he knew she hated.  
  
„Definitely the sunburn.“ She freed herself from his embrace and frowned.   
  
Theodore pouted. „I was really surprised that you wrote to me. In the meantime I was almost sure that you forgot about me.“   
  
„I’ve really tried but your bad jokes pursue me even in my dreams.“ She took the last step of the stairs and they walked deeper into the heart of the house.  
  
Theodore, as it’s customary for pureblood’s, was elegantly dressed. He wore a blue chequered jacket over a white shirt and matching tie. Hermione wondered if he came from a business meeting.  
  
„So, what’s the matter, Granger?“ He gave her a furtive look from the side as he waited for her answer. She knew he would see through her. Theodore was someone who could read people like a book and he had a sense when someone wanted something from him. Hermione was pretty sure that this was a trait other Slytherin’s shared.  
  
„You’re too smart, that’s the matter.“  
  
„Wow, so I am the one with the brains? Theodore Nott, brightest of his age. I like that. Maybe I’ll ask your favorite Potter if there’s a place in his clique?“ His voice dripped with sarcasm and his mouth did not even twitch. Hermione rolled her eyes.  
  
„Please, if you take it out of consideration because of me then do not let me stop you. I can write a recommendation if you like.“ Now it was her turn, she was just as good as him in a game of sarcasm. He knew that and just couldn't hide a little smile from her.  
  
He opened a large door that led into the living room and he sat down on one of the big sofas. This was the wing where Theo’s mother once lived, while his father used the middle part. A part of the house that was no longer used today. The living room was quite modern for magician standards and a doorway connected it to the big kitchen. Hermione sat down on the opposite couch and crossed her legs.  
  
„Let’s stop talking around the bush. You’re not back from the exile because you missed _me_ and not because you had a sunburn and now you’re afraid of skin cancer. What’s on your mind, Granger?“ Hermione knew Theodore too well. He tried to act like it was no big deal for him, but she knew that he was relieved about her return.She saw a certain sparkle in his eyes, which she knew only occurred when he was freed from worry.  
  
„My research makes no progress and I was hoping your family’s library would provide me with literature to fill in the holes of my thesis.“ That was not a lie after all neither the whole truth, Hermione thought.  
  
„You mean your research on muggleborns?“ Theodore put a hand on his chin and his interest was honest.  
  
„Yes, I’ve stumbled across several studies in America that showed that there are often links between wizard families and muggleborns that may have been around for several generations. My tests confirmed that this can be found in the DNA.“  
  
Theodore raised a brow and smirked at something, just like his father did. Hermione never quite understood why.  
  
„Well, you know my answer. Feel at home and read each book back and forth in this damn libary. I’m glad you’re back, Granger.“He smiled widely at her and she saw the little boy she met many years ago in him.  
  
They sat together until late in the evening. Lil came and went, brought coffee and tea, later wine and butterbeer. Hermione stayed in her pajamas for the rest of the evening while talking about God and the world and she felt like she had returned home after a long time.

~*~*~

When she was back in her chambers late at night, she found another envelope on her nightstand. She really needed to talk to Lil because she was not completely sure if she enjoyed this kind of housekeeping.  
  
The letter was from Harry, with introductions to the floo network regarding the ball of Miss Frey she was going to use and the dress code. She shook her head with a smile and crawled under the sheets. The tiredness made her eyelids heavy but she couldn’t deny that she was looking forward to the ball. It didn’t take a minute for Hermione to fall asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the Kudos! I can't wait to read what you think about this chapter! <3

Hermione stepped out of the fireplace at Frey mansion and looked around. She had picked her cherryblossom colored, full-length ball gown that matched her tanned skin perfectly. The sleeves were made of transparent tulle and lay loosely on her upper arms. From top to bottom, the dress was covered in small flowers and the cores were replaced by pearls. Her hair fell open over her shoulders and blended perfectly with the delicate pink of her dress. This was her absolute favorite because it reminded herof the clothes her father had sometimes brought her from traveling abroad.It even happened that she had refused to wear her pajamas at night, and instead slept in a princess dress.  
  
She walked to a golden vintage door where a short man greeted the arriving guests. He held a parchment roll and a quill in is hand checking each guest as they entered the venue. A small line had already formed in front of her, and it seemed to Hermione like an eternity, until it was finally her turn. She remembered the rules of conduct her governess had taught her and put on a modest smile. The man’s eyes widened as he realized who was standing in front of him.  
  
„Good evening, my name is Hermione Granger, I’m here with Harry Potter.“  
  
Hermione was glad that she was the last in line and therefore the only guest in the entrance hall. An astonished concierge was enough for an evening and she simply hoped she would vanish in the crowd of guests.  
  
„Mi-Miss Granger! What a pleasure to see you! O-of course, Mr. Potter is already inside, this way Miss!“ He opened his arm to the right and signaled her to go inside.  
  
„Thank you very much.“ Hermione dropped her gaze and smiled.  
  
She walked through the door into a splendid ballroom. The floor was a shiny parquet and the dancers reflected on the surface while they turned and swayed around the room. A big chandelier was hanging from the ceiling that filled the room with bright light, fading onto the patio. A magical string quartet played Waltz the second by Dmitri Shostakovich and Hermione’s heart felt light like a feather when she looked at the twirling pairs. The classical ball dance was always the only thing she enjoyed at these kind of events. A large glass front separated the ballroom from a garden filled with dozens of flowers and Hermione could see a pile of fairy lights and a fountain in the distance. In front of her, the hallway split into two staircases that led down to the dance floor and she wondered if there was a certain etiquette that suggested which staircase was more suitable for heartbroken war heroines.  
  
Suddenly, Hermione was torn from her mind when she realized that it was unusually quiet. It was a magical, intimidating moment when Hermione felt the hundreds of glances on her skin. People whispered and gasped , waiters holding tablets full of expensive champagne froze. Hermione smiled and had to admit that she had secretly longed for this very moment. A flash pulled her back into reality and she saw Rita Skeeter and her photographer Bozo in the heart of the crowd. Skeeter’s smile was wide, showing her white teeth while her magical quill was busy writing.  
  
She wanted to enjoy the attention just a moment longer before she let her gaze wander through the crowd. Hermione looked around unconsciously looking for a blond-haired man, but her gaze fell on Harry, who was waiting for her at the foot of the stairs. He had one hand in his pockets and the other reached out to her. He wore a navy colored wizard suit and an honest smile. The decision was already made. She took a deep breath and walked to meet her company for the evening, holding her tulle train in one hand and the other placed on the handrail.  
  
„Good evening, Mr. Potter.“ Hermione made a curtsey and laid her hand in Harry’s.  
  
„Miss Granger, how unexpected and marvelous to see you.“ He linked her arm into his and led her away from the stairs.  
  
„It seems like my appearance wasn’t as unexpected as I had hoped. The ministry sent me nearly ten letters this morning, begging me to work for them.“ Hermione rose a brow at Harry.  
  
„I told no one, if that's what you think. You know that I disapprove with the gossip and mud-slinging Skeeter and the Daily Prophet celebrate.“ He frowned at her and scratched the back of his head.  
  
„Then I have to wonder who did it. Matthew and Theodore are the only people left I talked to about my plans. But, never mind. Tonight is not about my reputation, it’s about yours!“ Hermione was gleefully. It has been the first time since forever that she got to see Harry twice within a week and the first time in years that they attended a social gathering together. „So, where can we find Mrs. Frey?“  
  
„Follow my lead!“ They strode around the dancing crowd who was busy to look anywhere but not at them and Harry handed her a glass of champagne that he took from a tray. She felt the sneaking looks on her and every now and then a little shiver on her neck but when she turned around to see who was watching her, no one was looking at her.  
  
As they passed a small fountain around which the open buffet was set, Harry pointed to a woman standing in front of an ice sculpture.  
  
Mrs. Frey had long black hair and the elegance of a swan. But Hermione had expected nothing less from a woman who made jewelry for the creme de la creme of the wizard high society. Hermione assumed that she was in her early sixty-something due to her wrinkles around her eyes and the way her hands were raddled. She wore a tight-fitting asymmetrical dress that had only one sleeve and a color gradient from white to black. The dress was made of flounce on which a dozen feathers snuggled from her left shoulder to her right hip.  
  
It was Hermione’s bad luck that she was too distracted by Frey’s dress and therefore did not notice who she was talking to. She pierced her fingers into Harrys arm as Narcissa Malfoy turned around and her cold blue eyes met hers. She wore an emerald green A-line satin off the shoulder dress. Her hair was perfectly styled and her pale skin looked like porcelain. If it hadn’t been for Harry Hermione would have fled. As he took a couple of steps towards Mrs. Fey, Hermione had no other choice but to follow him. Unsure where to look, she fixed her eyes on Mrs. Frey and forced a smile.  
  
„Oh, Mr. Potter, thank you for coming. I’m so pleased to see you and am I right that this is no other than Hermione Granger? Splendid!“ Mrs. Frey smirked and she reached her hand out to shake Hermiones, graceful and ladylike. „Of course you know my dear friend Narcissa Malfoy?“ She asked looking at Harry.  
  
„But of course Agatha, Mr. Potter and Hermione are good friends of mine. Hermione dear, it’s good to see you, how have you been?“ Narcissa looked Hermione straight in the eyes. There was something in her expression Hermione couldn't take a grasp of. She gave Harry a despairing look, but he went straight to his mission and engaged Mrs. Frey in a conversation. Before Hermione could react Narcissa’s hand was on her arm and she came closer.  
  
„I’m fine, thank you.“ The touch burned and Hermione couldn't help but stare at Narcissa’s hand. She flinched and pulled her arm out of her reach, hoping that it wasn’t too obvious.  
  
Narcissa’s hand floated at the same position she touched Hermione just seconds before and if Hermione would have been brave enough to look at her she would have seen a spark in her eyes.  
  
"I heard that you came back, but I did not think that I would be so happy to see you again so soon.“ A smile played on her lips and Hermione had a hard time not to think about the last time she had seen Narcissa. When Hermione lay on the floor of Malfoy Manor screaming for her life. „Did you already meet Draco?“  
  
Hermione's heart slipped into her stomach an she could feel her breath catching.  
„No not yet. Is he here?“Her voice rose two octaves and Hermione could have slapped herself.  
  
The light in Narcissa’s eyes began to dance and Hermione knew that she could not hide her intentions. „Oh yes. He will be very pleased to see you again."  
  
Hermione was pretty sure he was not. Since she did not know what to say, and Narcissa obviously couldn't take her eyes off her, Hermione decided to take a long sip from her glass. As Narcissa finally opened her mouth to say something else, but Hermione found the perfect opportunity to get into the conversation with Mrs. Frey.  
  
„Mrs. Frey, I was thrilled, when Harry told me that you were the one who made Mr and Mrs Weasley’s wedding rings.“ She put on her best smile and saw how Narcissa closed her mouth.  
  
„Yes, that was half an eternity ago. Arthur had sold almost all of his possessions to afford the rings. His devotion was so touching that I gave him a very good price.“ She winked at her and touched Narcissa arm as if she'd been there herself.. Narcissa laughed but her eyes were focused on Hermione before she blinked to the left .  
  
„Agatha, I’ve just saw someone I really need to talk to. Please excuse me. Hermione, Mr Potter, enjoy your evening.“  
  
Hermione sighed out of relieve as the Malfoy lady left the group. She could only hope that she did not run to Draco to make fun of her.  
When she returned to the conversation, she smiled satisfied. Harry had taken his chance and brought Mrs. Frey close to his concerns. It was probably an additional motivation for her, that she could add another pair of rings to her Weasley collection and as Hermione felt like Harry was good to be on his own, she excused herself to grab a drink.  
  
Hermione grabbed a drink from the bar and let her gaze wander through the crowd. A small desire, deep in her chest turned into a certain disappointment when her eyes did not find what they were looking for. But then there was a familiar face. Away from the crowd was Parvati Patil. Her arms were crossed and she had an annoyed facial expression that turned into a grin when she saw Hermione.  
  
She wore a modern light blue caftan with gold ornaments of flowers and leaves as well as embroidered pearls. From her shoulders fell a long cape to the floor and she wore a gold belt that emphasized her waist with a matching gold clutch. Her hair fell softly around her face with the upper half of it braided. Hermione just couldn't help herself but think Parvati looked like a model.  
  
„Parvati, it's been so long! You look great.“ They greeted each other with a kiss on the cheek and Hermione had never been happier to see her former classmate.  
  
„It really has been a while! And thank God, that you’re here today for a little fun, if not intentionally though. The gossip is delightful.“ Parvati winked at her and threw a strand over her shoulder. „I bet tonight everyone asks you the same boring questions, right? What are your plans, Mrs. Granger? Why are you giving up sunny California for rainy London? Bla bla bla. Boring! Please tell me something exciting before I die of boredom“ She rolled her eyes and took a sip of her champagne.  
  
Parvati and Hermione have never been something like good friends. Hermione was always too busy with her books and Parvati was focused on the latest face masks. It did not surprise her in the least that Parvati had no interest in her private life. Still, it was nice to speak with someone familiar.  
  
„You do not necessarily look like you have fun. Aren’t you here with Padma?“ Padma was Parvati’s twin sister. Even though the two were sorted into different houses, it was almost impossible to separate the two.  
  
„Oh, I don’t know. We haven't talked since forever I don’t know what she’s doing lately.“ Parvati turned her champagne glass in the light and watched as the light broke on the surface.  
  
Hermione’s eyes widened. She knew that the Patil sister would like to argue because they had completely different personalities but never was it so bad that they did not talk to each other afterwards. „You had a fight? I'm really sorry Parvati. What happened?“  
  
„Phew I can barely remember. She was already in a bad mood when she got up this morning and then she actually dumped her disgusting ginger tea all over my papers and thought I would not notice if she charmed it dry.“ She grimaced and sighed.  
  
"Okay, so you haven’t spoken since this morning? Like…today?“  
  
„Yes, that's what I said, right?“As a waiter passed, she swiftly exchanged her empty glass for a full one. „She has no idea what my boss will do to me if he figures that out. Speaking of him where is he? We’re here to win a client but he only cares about his private affairs.“ She sighed. "I want to go home.“  
  
Hermione had to admit that she had no idea what Parvati did for a living. „Oh you are here professionally? What exactly are you doing? Did you stay with divination?“  
  
„Not really. I work for a company that offers all sorts of services. From legal assistance to the investigation of prophecies.“ She waved as if she wanted to scatter a cloud of smoke and Hermione took this as a sign that Parvati did not want to go into too much detail. „Anyway. I should really go looking for him if I want to get home today. It was nice to see you again, we should meet for tea soon, Hermione.“ They kissed each other’s cheeks goodbye and Hermione watched her as she moved around the room, exchanging her glass for a full one once again. Either she was so nervous because she couldn’t find her boss, or she needed a little alcohol to forget the argument with her sister.  
  
And she was alone again. Great.  
Harry was still engrossed in a deep conversation with the hostess and Hermione didn’t want to bother him. Uncertain, she searched the crowd for a familiar face but as the only person she knew was Rita Skeeter, she decided to use the moment to escape to the garden.  
  
The cold evening air gave her goose bumps, because even though it was was already April, the nights were almost freezing. She spoke a heating charm und looked at her mobile phone. It was definitely too soon to leave but she would not risk meeting Narcissa again while Harry was still busy.  
  
The garden of the estate was covered with wildflowers in every possible color and she could hear a fountain splashing. The sound gave her a feeling of nostalgia. Like she could not grasp a certain thought, but she knew it reminded her of something. On the surface of the water, lights danced and Hermione turned away as her heart tightened. Narcissa said that Malfoy would be here too. But how would she react if she saw him again? What would she have to say to him? Why should he even care what she has to say? She had avoided reading the Daily Prophet, but when she did, she automatically searched for him. It was so bad that Matthew had to threw every issue into the fire. It’s a lot easier to like someone than to hate him obsessively.  
  
Absently, Hermione wandered through the countless rows of flowers. They smell was so wonderful that Hermione was sure that they were enchanted. She turned around a big rose hedge and there he was.  
  
There was no need to see his face, and not enough darkness to hide him. She would recognize his broad, graceful shoulders from one in a million. Her heart stopped. It wasn’t since the end of the war that she saw him. Even when he had to face trial she decided to submit her testimony in writing and even when he wrote her a letter, probably to thank her, she did not read it. To be more precise, she stowed it in a box along with other things that reminded her of him and with it hopefully every feeling for him. Seconds passed as she just stood and stared at Draco Malfoy’s back of his head. Adrenaline was rushing through her veins and her legs started to feel like jelly.  
  
When she finally came back to her senses she wondered if she could just turn on her heels and run without him noticing her. She narrowed her eyes to see better and her stomach turned when she noticed that he wasn’t alone. And at that moment Hermione noticed loud lip smacking, so loud that her brain blanked out before she could even look at it. Hermione cringed when a hand found it’s way on Malfoy’s back and the shock of blonde hair appeared in her view. The unknown woman kissed his neck and jaw loudly, while her hands groped their way onto his back, pushing and scratching through his shirt.  
  
When Malfoy pulled her head back to kiss the stranger's lips, moaning softly, Hermione was mortally embarrassed. She stepped back in shock and the pebbles under her shoes filled the night with a scratchy noise. Malfoy’s head shot to the side and Hermione saw the light of the ballroom gleam in his grey eyes. She turned on her heel and ran before their eyes could possibly meet. Her heart was aching.  
  
Back in the ballroom she throttled her speed and tried to find Harry. He was standing apart from the crowd with a glass of champagne in his hands and a smile on his lips.  
  
„So, it went well with you and Mrs Frey?“ she tried to catch her breath so that he wouldn’t notice the conflict in her mind.  
  
„She agreed to meet with me but she said she can’t promise anything! I think that’s a good start!“ He took a sip from his champagne and beamed at her. „Where have you been?“  
  
„I was in the garden, getting some fresh her.“ She sighed and pressed a finger against her temple.„I’m not feeling really well Harry, would you mind if I excuse myself for tonight?“  
  
„Of course not! Let’s say goodbye to Mrs. Frey and leave. The aftermath of the port key is killing me!“ He grabbed her elbow and lead her through the hall. Mrs. Frey wished a good night and thanked her for coming. Harry said goodbye to a minister from Ireland and promised to go out for dinner with him soon.  
  
As they climbed the stairs, Hermione felt a thousand glances on her shoulders and she was sure that one certain pair was bright blue. It took her a great deal of effort not look back at him and it was torture when she had to avoid his eyeseven though she had the opportunity to look at him. Nothing good could come of it and she was not allowed to tear the seam in her heart anew.  
  
She promised Harry to meet him for lunch on Monday and she kissed his cheek before she stepped into the fireplace.  
  
As she stepped through the floor into her room at the Nott estate she laid down on her bed, fully dressed. She did not dare to close her eyes because she knew what image she would see. Her heart thumped loudly and her blood rushed in her ears. She caught a single tear before it could leave her eye and she hated herself for this weakness. For hours she just laid there until the tiredness drew her further into the deep. A deep dream where she could not escape him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took my some days to edit this! Big thanks to my lovely friends Correllia_art and gnahfail for rereading and editing! 
> 
> I try to upload chapter 5 on Wednesday!
> 
> You can find a "Song of the chapter" at the end! :)

Hermione got up very early on Monday. Her meeting with Kingsley was set for 11 am but she wanted to send out some apartment requests before that. Her outfit was planned carefully. She chose a black blouse that had ribbons on the ends of her sleeves and with that she wore a plum-colored skirt that she had bought last fall. It was nothing too exciting but a professional outfit that underscored her feminine side.

 

On Sunday morning she received a letter from Ginny. They arranged a date for lunch and Ginny offered her to join the apartment viewing. It was just like if she had never left London. Hermione was grateful that Ginny had approached her, especially after what had happened between Ron and her, she was afraid of losing her friend forever

 

Green flames blazed as Hermione entered the black marble tiles of the Ministry. In the Ministry lobby, Voldemort’s terrible statue was replaced by a beautiful fountain that showed the inhabitant of the magical wizard community in unity. Next to a muggle-looking boy stood a houself and a goblin. To his right was a women dressed in traditional wizard clothing with a centaur pointing to the sky. The Ministry was vivid at these hours and many wizards and witches walked past Hermione on their way to work. Some gave her a curious look, others were too busy to be on time.. 

 

Hermione took her letter from Kingsley and went to the reception, which was a few feet away from the elevators. The receptionist was involved in a heated discussion with Rita Skeeter, who furiously waved her press pass while her photographer Bozo cleaned the lense of his magical camera, and Hermione cleared her throat, freezing Rita on the spot. When she turned around she had set a big grin on her lips..

 

„Oh, Mrs. Granger, perfect timing! You’re the one I was looking for! Can you please tell this person that I’m here to join you and minister Shaklebot for your interview?" 

 

Hermione blinked at her words „Excuse me but I don’t know why I would want you to be here, Mrs. Skeeter.“ 

 

„Well, because I’m going to make sure everyone in town, no, across the country, knows that Hermione Granger, survivor, war heroine, everybody’s darling is here to change the Ministry!“ Rita Skeeter licked her lips and Hermione saw a hunger for another story in her eyes. Her acid green Quick-Quotes Quill magically raced over a small piece of parchment. 

 

Hermione pulled her bag over her shoulder and grabbed the visitor’s pass from the receptionist. „I’m sorry Mrs. Skeeter but I think that this is none of your business. If you want to do something productive, how about exposing the ills in the north of England? I heard that there is a criminal ring of houseelf dealers.“ She pushed a strand behind her ear and stared at Rita. 

 

But Rita only gave her a compassionated look.  „But Mrs. Granger, who in the world cares for something like that? You are the one people want to see and it’s my duty to do what my readers demand! You understand that don’t you?“. She turned around and snapped her finger at the photograph. „Bozo take a picture!“

A bright flash appeared and Hermione turned around and strutted to the lifts. She climbed into the first one that arrived and pulled the grid shut behind her. Rita gave some hastily instructions to Bozo who tried to reload the flash before the elevator finally set in motion. The last thing she saw was how Bozo lowered his camera and looked sad. 

 

Kingsley’s office was on the top floor of the Ministry and she was glad when she reached her destination without the lift stopping again. Hermione straightened her coat and knocked on the door, uncertain with what results she would leave it. 

 

~*~*~

 

She met Ginny in front of the King’s Corner, a newer restaurant at Diagon Alley that was famous for its sandwiches. The red haired witch was dressed in a green dress and brown boots, her hair laid open over her shoulders with her pony braided backwards. Her smile widened when she saw Hermione. They decided on a table by the window and ordered two sandwiches. Before Ginny could say anything, Hermione wanted to get something out off her mind.

 

„Ginny, I’m so sorry that I didn’t keep in touch with you in the recent years. You’re so important to me but I was afraid that you would judge me, because of the things I have done. I just want you to know, you are still really important to me and I hope you can forgive me.“ Hermione’s voice was low as she spoke and she tried to suppress the trembling. „After Ron made this humiliating marriage proposal, I simply did not know what to do next. It was just too much for me and I had a nervous breakdown. I just wanted to run as far as I could and I thought that if I just cut all ties to Ron it would be easier to let go.“ She had her hands crossed on the table and nervously played around the corner of her thumbnail. She did not dare to look at Ginny.

  


But Ginny put her hands on Hermione’s and smiled.  
„I’m a little bit offended that you did not expect me to be on your side because I’m totally biased! Sure, Ron is my brother but he behaved like a complete ass and if I had been in your place I would probably have thrown him out of the window! How could he dare to do such a thing to you after everything that happened? I assure you that since then, I have spoken to him only the most necessary.“ Ginny’s eyes were full of fire and she squeezed Hermione’s hand. „Of course I should have written you, but we all thought it would be the best if we gave you the time you needed. I knew that sooner or later you would come back.“  
  
Suddenly, Hermione’s vision blurred because she was so touched and her feelings overran her. Hastily she wiped a tear from the corner of her eye and chuckled. The waitress came back to their table, brought their food and the two women exchanged looks and laughed. They talked about the things that they missed in each other’s lives. Ginny was really curious about Matthew and Hermione had to promise that she’ll introduce her to him. Hermione knew through the Daily Prophet that Ginny played Quidditch for the Holyhead Harpies and although Hermione had only little interest in the sport, she was curious about the Quidditch league.  
  
They talked about Hermione’s meeting with Kingsley. He had offered her several positions at the Ministry and made it pretty clear that he was willing to pay her every salary she wished. It almost seemed as if he was afraid of her cleverness being lost for the Ministry’s effectuation. There were a few positions that came into questions but she wanted to consider all possibilities in peace. Especially the position for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement seemed very promising. It was a position quite similar to that of a prosecutor. Before a defendant had to face the Wizengamot, he had the opportunity to avoid criminal proceedings if he could prove his innocence. Hermione would be the one who, along with the defender of the other side, advised and compared if there was any possibility to avoid a lawsuit. She told Kingsley that she would answer him by the end of the week.  
  
After they finished their lunch and had a look at the apartments, it felt just like it used to be. She told two landlords that she was very interested and they agreed to contact her soon. Ginny had training in the evening and so the girls said goodbye for the day.

~*~*~

The sun was already low as Hermione strolled through Diagon Alley. The red light bathed the shops in its color and gave the street a magical charm. It was safer to go around Weasley & Weasley, just in case Ronald looked out of the windows, or even left the store. She stopped in front of her favorite bookshop and sighed at the sight of it, while a thousand recollections came to her mind. Flourish and Blotts was for Hermione what other children’s playground was. She could spend hours in this shop, immersing herself in thousand different stories without getting bored for a second.  
  
She pushed the heavy door open and heard the bell toll announcing a new visitor. A young witch stood behind the cash register, it’s counter filled with dozens of books. Hermione gave her a smile and took the stairs to her left, up to the second floor. There were countless rows of shelves full of fictitious books, from A to Z, magical and mundane. Hermione’s favorite genre. Past the muggle books and the thrillers, Hermione devoted herself to the Historical Novels and she pulled a book with a purple cover from the top shelf. Greedily, she devoured page by page and before she knew it, she stood with her back against the shelf, unaware of anything else in the world.  
  
Already a quarter in, she finally decided to take the book home with her. She looked at the cover one last time before she made her way to the cash register. When she stepped into the narrow hallway between the shelves, she immediately jumped back into the historical section.  
  
_FUCK. FUCK. FUCK._  
  
Without batting an eyelid, she turned her back to the hallway, opened the book holding it so close to her face, that it was covered completely, as if she was reading a particularly exciting page.  
  
„Granger?“ She cursed under her breath as Draco Malfoy stepped around the shelf.  
  
She blinked as if he had torn her from a deep thought, her eyes fixed on the page. „Oh, Malfoy. Hi.“ She wanted to slap herself.  
  
„So, it was you. Why did you jump away like a frightened chicken?“Draco smirked, raising a brow at her.  
  
Hermione flipped the page and tried her best to focus her eyes on the word „unpleasant“ oh, how fitting. „Did I do that? I honestly do not remember.“  
  
His long, slender fingers took the book out of her hand and turned it to read the back.  
„Is that a good book?“ He asked, scanning the summary.  
  
Now Hermione had to look at him after all. It was the first time in three years that she saw his face. Well, she saw him in the Daily Prophet once or twice but she always told herself that it didn’t count. Draco looked much older now. Less like a boy and more like a man. He was wearing a navy blue blazer with a hood on the back. She stared at his long lashes before his blue eyes met hers. Her chest felt like it was about to burst, and she was sure that everyone within two miles could hear her heartbeat.

  
When she spoke, her voice sounded thin „Nathaniel Klein is well known for his historic romans. I have not had the chance to read this series but it seems to be promising.“She quickly crossed her arms over her chest as she desperately tried to escape his gaze.  
  
„Isn’t he more of a children’s book author?“ The band between their eyes broke as Malfoy scowled at the book.  
  
Hermione groaned indignantly. He obviously did not seem to have any idea. „Um, no? Klein’s books have always been highly historically accurate and, therefore, sometimes very brutal.“

  
„Historically accurate? Then how about the book he wrote about the Goblin Wars? As far as I can remember not a single date was correct.“  
  
She tore the book from his hand and seethed. „Yes, Malfoy. That’s why we call it fiction. Nevertheless, all current events were presented in detail and every historical background was taken into account.“  
  
„Fiction is not an excuse for bad writing.“ His smile was devilish and he put his hand to his chin.  
  
„Well, your opinion is not an excuse for your bad taste.“ Hermione wanted to hate him. Who does he think he is? Why does he think that his opinion matters?  
  
He drew closer and supported his left arm against the shelf. Hermione felt sick. She wanted to disappear but Malfoy lowered his voice as he said: „Why did you ran away last night?  
  
Hermione’s eyes met his again as she turned her head towards him. Suddenly, a loud rumble from the stairs followed by the loud noise of heels distracted Hermione.  
  
„Draco, are you here? I’m ready to go-ho!“  
Malfoy rolled his eyes and Hermione turned away, once again hiding her face in her book.  
  
„I found the issue of Witch Weekly that I was looking for but it seems like they postponed the interview to next week . Apparently it was too much-„ Pansy Parkinson appeared and beamed at Draco. She had one hand on her waist and her eyes fluttered from Malfoy to Hermione. She gasped. „Granger?! Is that you?“ Pansy looked at Draco in disbelief. „Draco, isn’t that Hermione Granger?!“ Her forefinger pointed to Hermione. How rude.  
  
She could do nothing but turn around and lower her book. Could it get any worse?  
Pansy Parkinson’s Pixie Face was framed in her perfect bob cut and Hermione hated the fact that she never looked unstylish. Hermione tried to smile and she did not want to know how she looked at that moment.  
  
„Oh, it _is_ you Granger!“ Pleasantly Pansy clapped her hands and Hermione felt the urge to clap her own hands against Pansy’s face.

  
„Yes, Parkinson it is me. Hello and goodbye, I have to go.“ Hermione tried to keep her composure, but as she wanted to walk past them, Pansy vigorously blocked the way.  
  
„No, you can’t go Granger! It’s been so long! How about you eat dinner with us? Are you free?“  
  
She did not know what to say, so she gave Malfoy a disbelieving look.  
„Me. Eating Dinner. With you.“ Maybe she had fainted and hallucinated because there was no possible reason why the girl that teased her at school on every given occasion, invited her to dinner.  
  
„Why not? I mean we’ve know each other for so long and I would love to know what’s up with you right now!“ It really seemed like Pansy was serious. Maybe someone has taken Polyjuice and pretended to be Pansy? Or maybe she and Malfoy just made fun of her again?  
  
She laughed in disbelief, a sad smile on her lips. „What’s wrong with you? Is this a joke?“ Hermione did not dare to look at the girl standing in front of her, so she fixed her gaze on her shoes. She felt Draco shifting his weight.  
  
Pansy and Draco exchanged a look and Pansy’s voice cracked at her words. „What’s wrong with _you_? I’m just asking you if you would like to dine with us. Why are you so tense?“  
  
It was like someone doused Hermione with a bucket of cold water, her head snapped up and her eyes were like ice. Did she miss something? _She_ was the one who was tense? Pansy had been tense for eight years just because Hermione had not been sorted into Slytherin.  
  
As she tried to find the words that somewhere stuck in her throat she frowned contemptuously. „This is bollocks.“ She pushed the book back to the shelf and swept past Pansy and Draco. As she hurried down the stairs, Draco could hear her swearing. Hermione yanked the door open and the bell shook as it feel back into the lock.  
  
For a moment there was complete silent in the store before Draco turned around, grabbed Pansy’s upper arm and pushed her against the shelf.  
  
„What the fuck did you think you were doing?“ His face was wrinkled with anger and his eyes sparkled threateningly.  
  
Pansy struggled to free herself from his grip and straightened her hair to override her anger. „You told me to be nice to her and that’s what I did! It’s not my fault that Granger has a stick up on here ass!“  
  
„We agreed to be nice to her but _not_ to bother her.“ Dracos voice was quiet and insistent and made her feel uncomfortable.  
  
They glared at each other for a moment before Draco released his grip on her. With a quick movement, he pushed a blond strand back to it’s original place before he looked around. „Let’s get out of here, Pans.“ He straightened his blazer and tie before taking the book with the purple cover from the shelf and heading to the cashier.  
  
Pansy began to grin like a snake that had cornered a rat. Oh, that should be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song of the Chapter: Birdy - Keeping your head up


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to correlia_art and my friend Ellie for adjustments and notes!

_The heat pressed against the windows of Malfoy Manor as the young Draco Malfoy had withdrawn to the far corner of the library. He sighed and turned the pages of his book. If it just wasn’t so terribly hot, he could practice flying in the garden. But in this heat it was hard to bear. He read „Hogwarts: A History“ for the second time because it was „only" three years before he would start his studies at Hogwarts and he wanted to know everything there is to know.  
  
_ _There was a knock on the door and Draco leaned forward to see. „Yes?“_   
  
_The door opened tentatively and the little house-elf Dobby entered the room. „Young master Draco, Dobby is here to tell you that Lady Malfoy is expecting you in the dinning room.“ He played nervously with his hands, which were covered with countless dirty patches._   
  
_Draco groaned and put the book back in its place on the shelf. It was definitely too early for dinner and he wondered what it was that his mother wanted from him. He followed the elf through the long corridors of the house and when his mother appeared, he put on his best smile. With a kiss on his head, Narcissa greeted her only son._   
  
_„Listen, Draco. Mr. Nott arrived just now. He brought his son Theodore and his niece Hermione. Can you promise me that you will take good care of them today? Your father does not want to be disturbed.“_   
  
_He had met Theodore several times before. The boy was pretty quiet but Draco found his presence pleasant. Theodore, like him, was smart and could handle the broom well. For others, his personality might seem daunting or unsympathetic, but Draco knew still waters run deep._   
  
_„Who is Hermione, mother? I have never heard that name before.“ Draco knew every familythat consorted with his own as well as all heirs. Sometimes he had to recite all pureblood families, family members and their origin but he couldn’t recall Hermione._   
  
_Narcissa dropped to her knees to eye level with Draco. She gently tucked a strand of hair behind his ear and took his hand. „Her family used to be part of the wizard community, but since her mother passed away a few years ago, her father decided to live off the beaten track. Please be nice to her, Draco.“_   
  
_Draco swallowed hard. He had never met anyone who had lost his mother and he couldn’t imagine how awful that was. Lucius Malfoy cared little for him and his mother was the only one who understood him. He could not imagine what it would be like without her._   
  
_„I sent the two to the garden. Please join them.“ She patted his shoulder and disappeared into the tea room._   
  
_As he went outside, Draco saw Theodore and the girl standing in the shade of a large tree. Theodores cousin had incredibly crinkly shoulder length hair that framed her rosy cheeks. Something very funny must have happened, because Hermione was holding a hand over her mouth and for the first time in his life Draco saw Theodore smile._   
  
_Her laughter echoed through the garden as Draco stopped in front of them and reached out his hand. „My name is Draco Malfoy. Nice to meet you.“ He nodded at Theodore „Hello, Theo.“_   
  
_„Hello, I’m Hermione Granger.“ She took his hand and shook it as a smile played around her lips. „Theodore told me so many things about you.“_   
  
_Draco raised a brow and looked at Theodore who didn’t budge._   
  
_It didn’t take long for the ice between them to break. And so they spent the whole day lying in the grass and watching the little gnomes pollinate the flowerbeds. Draco learned that Hermione was interested in books just like he was, but found it unbelievable that she had never read „Flying who the Cannons“ or „Gadding with Ghouls“._   
_„How can it be that you do not have books about magic at home?“ Draco asked curiously. They sat side by side while Theodore had fallen asleep in the grass._   
  
_She shrugged her shoulders. „Since my father does not use magic at home, he probably does not see a need for it.“ A gentle breeze blew and Draco noticed the fine freckles on her nose. „My mother was a muggle and she reacted very sensitive to magic, I think he just does not like to use it“_   
  
_Draco froze in place and his eyes widened. „So…so, you are not a pureblood?“ He had never spoken to anyone who wasn’t pureblood and he had assumed that they would be…well…not that enchanting like Hermione was._   
  
_She looked deep into his eyes and Draco’s stomach turned when she asked: „What is a pureblood?“_  
  


~*~*~  
  


Today was Hermione’s first day at work. It had taken her four pro and contra lists until she was sure which position she wanted to go for and another three sleepless nights until she was aware of her requirements. Rosa had returned ten minutes later and brought her her employment contract and employee ID.   
  
Hermione took the elevator down to the dungeon. Since de Department of Magical Law Enforcement worked closely with the Wizengarmot, her office was located on the deepest and darkest floor. Her new boss Helena Higgs, greeted her politely as she got off the elevator and led her into an open-plan office. She shared her office with Maria Glasshop, who was a couple of years older than Hermione, and her former classmate Susan Bones, who was their secretary.   
  
After she had spent the morning sorting documents and setting up her desk, her mobile phone rang in her jacket pocket. She pulled it out quickly and saw that she had a message from Matthew. For quite some time, the two used text messages to communicate with each other, because it was so much easier and faster and she just got used to it.   
  
_Mione my love,_   
_I’m coming to London this weekend so polish your best shoes and think about where we’re going to party! :-*_   
  
_Greetings from sunny California;_   
_Mathew_   
  
Hermione could only laugh and shook her head. She was glad he missed her, but she had not expected him to visit her so soon, because if Matthew hated one thing, it was rain. Right now it was raining cats and dogs.At least she would not get bored this weekend because boredom means time and time means time to think.   
  
A glance at the clock told Hermione it was time to pick Harry up for lunch. She told Susan that she would come back in an hour and rushed to the elevator. The receptionist, an older women that reminded her of Molly Weasley, showed her the way to Harry’s office and told her to just knock. She did as she was told and a couple of seconds later she could hear Harry calling: „Come in.“   
  
Hermione pushed open the door and when she saw who was sitting in Harry’s guest chair she started to wonder why she was so unlucky. Draco turned around and grinned his stupid smile. She looked at Harry who beamed at her.   
  
„Sorry Harry, I did not know you were busy. Good day, Malfoy.“ “She forced a smile.   
  
Draco stood from his chair and buttoned up his jacket. „Good day indeed Granger, what a pleasure to see you again.“

„I can not necessarily say the same thing.“ Hermione bit her tongue. Pull yourself together, Granger. „Should I come back later, Harry?“ She was already turning around and walking as Harry spoke.    
  
„No, we’re done here. Draco would you like to join us for lunch?“    
  
Did he just…? She must have misheard. Harry Potter asked his ex-nemesis if he would like to join them for lunch? Hermione felt like the world turned upside down.   
  
„It would be an honor but unfortunately I have another appointment, Harry.“   
  
They actually called to each other by their first names. What the hell had happened since she left? Did _everyone_ go crazy? Hermione got a headache. She had come here to solve some of her problems but she had not expected everything to be in shambles.   
  
„Alright but you’re coming to our cracker-barrel on Friday, right?“    
  
They shook hands and Hermione made room so that Draco did not even think of shaking her’s too.

„Of course! I owe you one.“ Draco turned to face Hermione but she fixed her eyes on a spot on the wall. Harry shrugged as Draco gave him an amused look. „Well, have a nice day.“   
  
A soon as Draco was out of the room Hermione rushed to shut the door and Harry took cover.

„Harry. James. Potter. What. The. Actual. FUCK IS GOING ON?!“ Her face was red like a tomato and she had a hard time to control her voice again.

Harry sighed and took his jacket from the wardrobe. „After he was acquitted, Draco worked here for a while and we’re kind of buddies now. It’s really hard to explain but he changed and he supports my orphanage project. Can we go eat now, I’m starving.“ He scratched the back of his head, smiled shyly and opened the door for her.

 

~*~*~

 

Harry insisted on going to King’s Corner, the restaurant she had visited with Ginny before, because he was craving for a ham sandwich. Hermione ordered a salad.

„I know it’s hard to imagine but Draco has totally changed.“ Harry took a great bite from his Sandwich.   
  
Hermione dropped her fork. Her appetite had passed. „Malfoy stays Malfoy.“   
  
„Yes, I know, but he really tries. You should give him a chance to convince you!“ Harry looked so confident that Hermione could not argue with him. She did not even know if she wanted to though.   
  
„Please, let us change the subject.“ She picked up her fork and pecked in her food. „What about your proposal? Have you already thought about what you want to do now that the ring is cut and dried?“   
  
„Oh, yes. Yes I did!" Harry pushed his glasses up and beamed. „Ginny has a very important game next month, here in England, and I wondered if I should do it there. I already talked with her captain and he thought it was terrific!“

Wow, that really sounded like an idea Ginny would like! Contrary to what Ron had come up with…but that was nothing Hermione wanted to think about right now.

„Perfect! That will be an evening she’ll never forget, Harry!“ She reached for his hand and felt how he relaxed. Damn, she acted like such a bitch, though Harry only wanted to share his joy with her. She could not always lose control, just because Draco came around the corner. She had to get used to it. „You said something about a cracker-barrel earlier?“    
  
„Every other Friday of the month we all go to the Dragonfly and have a drink after work. Do you feel like coming by?“ Hermione saw something twinkle in his eyes and she knew that she had to go.   
  
„Who else will be there apart from you and Draco?“ She tried to put on an indifferent expression.   
  
„Well, Ginny, Angelina, Anthony, Ernie and his boyfriend, Draco’s friends and some other people.“ He stopped and inhaled, catching Hermiones glance. She knew that she looked like she wanted him not to mention one name in particular. „But certainly not Ronald. He’s not in town.“ He winked at her and Hermione knew that she had to endure it. It would be weird to meet all these people after so much time. But that’s why she was here, right? Among other things…   
  
She took a deep breath and looked him straight in the face. „When does it start?“

 

~*~*~

 

The remaining week went by a blink of an eye but Hermione’s luck did not return. She met Malfoy almost every day. Tuesday she saw him twice in the elevator. When she had lunch with her colleagues on Wednesday, he sat at another table. He spoke with his companions, but their eyes met constantly. On Thursday she was almost paranoid, so that, when she saw him as she stepped out of the elevator, she just turned around and drove up again. Why was this guy always where she was? She had not seen Theodore for days and _he_ lived in a house with her.   
  
When she managed to reach her office on Friday without seeing him, she took a deep breath. Susan gave her a careful look. „Miss- Miss Granger, a-are you alright?“

She was a nice girl but she was so terribly shy. Hermione had told her several times that she should address her by her first name, but she didn’t dare.

„Susan, do you know if Malfoy happens to work here? In the Ministry?“   
  
The girl looked like Hermione had drowned her favorite cat. „Y-y-you mean Lucius M-malfoy?“ She whispered his name and Hermione rolled her eyes.  
  
„Lucius Malfoy is in Azkaban, Susan. I mean the younger one. Draco.“ Hermione caught herself whispering his name as well. Hermione saw how Susan moved her lips but she could not understand a word.Maria dropped by and put a stack of files on Susan’s desk.

„He used to work at this department before he moved to the Auror Headquarters. Susan is terribly scared of him. Good looking men disturb her.“ She chuckled loudly and winked at her.

„And what is he doing now?“ She played with the corner of a file and tried to make it sound casually.

Maria shrugged and returned to her affairs. Susan looked like she was about to cry. And Hermione shook her head at his.

 

~*~*~

 

Hermione was way too late. She decided to change her business blouse into a loose fitting leather jacket and pulled it out of the limitless depth of her bag when she hurried to the apparition point. Without her expansion charm, Hermione would have been desperate without this little trick for the more frequently. She stopped briefly to refresh her lipstick and with a bang she landed at Diagon Alley. Matthew was already standing in front of the Dragon Fly’s entrance as her dark brown ankle boots clattered over the paving stones.   
  
She was completely out of breath when she arrived. „I’m so sorry Matthew, I forgot the time.“    
  
„It’s okay, I was in good company.“ He pulled her into a hug and gave her a sunny smile before he pointed to his left. There stood Parvati Patil, who gave her a cheeky smile and held her clutch in front of her body. Hermione thought that she looked like an Indian princess, her shoulder off dress was dark red with gold ornaments on the sleeves and her shoes looked as if they were made of gold.   
  
Hermione broke away from him to greet Parvati. „Wow, Parvati, you look great. Are you here for the cracker-barrel?“ Something about this woman felt intimidating, either her dark eyes or her expression, which was always unimpressed.   
  
She clucked her tongue and came a few steps closer. „No ten horses would get me in such a bar, Hermione.“ She could feel Parvati probing her with her eyes before she turned to Matthew. „You’re her boyfriend?“ Parvati raised her eyebrows and put a hand on her hip.   
  
Suddenly, Hermione felt out of place. Matthew looked from Hermione to Parvati and started to smile while touching his neck nervously. „Well, no. I’m single.“   
  
If Hermione had seen Parvati’s face she would have noticed the light dancing in her eyes. She flipped her hair and pulled a business card out of her purse. It was a little strange when she took another step towards Matthew and pressed her card against his chest.   
  
„How about you come with us, Parvati?“ He spoke softly and Hermione wondered if Parvati was holding her breath.   
  
„No, I’m here with my boss. But when you get bored, you know where to find me.“ She winked at Hermione once more, before her long legs stepped into the night.   
  
The penny dropped and Hermione and Matthew could not help but laugh. Hermione was in tears when Matthew pushed aside the dark curtains of the Dragonfly. The bar was crowded but Hermione could see her friend’s red hair, which blazed like fire through the crowd, as she tried to force her way to her. Matthew grabbed her hand and she could barely ignore the murmurs and glances. The table selected by the clique was at the far end of the room and Ginny beamed as she saw them.   
  
„Hermione, you came! And who’s this good looking, tanned man? Your date?“ Her smirk was wide and Hermione rolled her eyes.   
  
Hermione introduced Matthew to Harry and Ginny and since the corner was already occupied, Ginny and Harry joined them to look for another table. She ordered two margaritas, another butterbear for Ginny, firewiskey for Harry and a serving nachos before they fell into a deep conversation.   
  
„So, Matthew, I heard you work for the MACUSA. In which position are you?“ Harry took a sip and smiled at Matthew.   
  
„The department in LA is specialized on Cover Vigilance and No-Maj Obliviations.“ Matthew was an expert in erasing and modifying memories but also in restoring them.While working for the MACUSA he had to deal with a lot muggles who found out about the magical world which was right in front of their noses. It also happened that wizards had to be obligated when they were banished from the wizarding world. Their magical powers were sealed. A cruel punishment.   
  
Ginny had never been to America and was head over heels for everything Matthew had to say. Hermione’s first drink kicked in and when she excused herself to use the bathroom Matthew stood up to help her from her stool.   
  
As she returned from the restroom she noticed Theodore sitting at another table. She wanted to say hello but when she saw who he was with, she felt the urge to pass them straightly. To his left sat Pansy and right beside her Draco. She rolled her eyes and sighed while her legs started to feel like jelly. It was pretty rare that she saw Theodore, and she did not want to be chased away by a few snakes. Back at Hogwarts, she had to walk to their little clique when she needed something from Theodore. Suddenly, the fear was back that they would giggle and laugh when she started to talk and call her names when she turned her back to them. Hermione gathered all her courage, straightened her jacket and put on her „nice to see you all“ smile. Nervously, she played with the pendant around her neck.   
  
It was Pansy who noticed her first. „Oh, Granger, what a sight for sore eyes.“ She held her glass in one hand while she supported her chin with the other, her face looked like she had eaten something sour. Within a blink of an eye Theodore stood and spun around. Hermione embraced him and placed a kiss on his cheek while she glanced at Draco, who, to her surprise, had also gotten up. The whole group seemed sort of out of place. Their chic outfits and expensive shoes did not suit the-mid range bar they were in.   
  
„Granger, what a surprise! I didn’t know you’re were coming.“ The corner of his mouth went up a little bit and Hermione knew he was genuinely happy. In his own way. „Please sit down, would you like to have a drink?“ He was already pushing his chair back when Hermione waved in denial.   
  
„No, thank you. I’m here with a friend.“ Her thumb pointed in the direction of Matthew sitting with Ginny and arry. „I just wanted to come over and say hello.“ Her eyes flattered to Draco and as their eyes met, she ran her fingers through her hair. „Um, you should come over later, so I can introduce you to Matthew.“    
  
„Yes, I’ll do that. Perfect!“ Theodor’s was really loud. His expression did not change and Hermione was obviously confused.   
  
„Okay, good, see you later then?“ She glanced at Pansy and when she felt Malfoy’s eyes rested on her she turned and left.   
  
When Hermione was out of hearing range, Pansy drank the rest of her cosmopolitan. „You behave like two complete idiots, you know that right?“    
  
„I did not even say anything.“ Draco wrinkled his nose.   
  
„Yeah, that’s what I meant. Never mind, I’ll go dancing, wanna join?“ She looked from Draco to Theo.   
  
„I’ll pass. Tonight is Theo’s turn.“ The waitress walked by and Draco ordered another firewhiskey.

 

~*~*~

 

Four margaritas later, Hermione found herself in the middle of the dance floor with Matthew. Ginny and Harry danced a few step away, devouring to a cadence that was far too slow for the pop song the magical jukebox was playing. In California, Hermione and Matthew had been out dancing almost every weekend and it felt so natural that the people around them staring didn’t bother her at all. Still, the hair on her neck stood up every time a blue pair of eyes laid on her but she tried her best not to think about him, which was especially hard since she felt his presence. Apparently Hermione was unaware that the alcohol did not make her think less about him, instead she wished more and more that he looked at her. It made her crazy. She did not know what he wanted from her at all. He had failed to be nice to her for ten years and now it was definitely too late…right?   
  
Hermione sighed and Matthew pulled her closer when the jukebox switched to a slow ballad. She put her arms around him and imagined that he was someone else. Did Draco smell that way? She couldn’t remember. Slowly, Matthew slipped his hands into Hermione’s hair and she felt his other hand resting on her lower back. They turned on the dance floor and she felt him pressing closer. Why could she just not forget him? He had tormented and humiliated her and yet… Her eyelids fluttered as she felt Matthew’s lips against her neck. Hermione shuddered. That did not feel right. It had become so stuffy and Hermione felt like she could’t breathe. Her cheeks glowed as she tried to push him away but her muscles felt so weak and heavy. Within seconds, he grabbed the wrist of the hand with which she pressed against him and held it firmly next to his hands. She jumped. The pressure on her magic scar, that Bellatrix had caused her,made her dizzy. Her tongue felt knotted and when she tried to speak she stuttered.   
  
„Pscht, don’t say anything. I know. I already know.“ His voice was close to her ear and she wanted to run away, but the burning in her arm stunned her. Her entire body stiffened as he kissed her neck again, the pain in her arm spreading through every limb. Matthew straightened up to meet her eyes and she felt the tips of his fingers on her cheek.    
  
It was that moment when a pale hand grabbed his arm and forcibly pulled him away. Matthew quickly let her go and Hermione collapsed to her knees. The throbbing in her arm became stronger with each passing, her view blurred.   
  
Matthews voice roared above the music. „What the fuck do you thing you’re doing, man?“ A string came loose from his perfectly-trimmed hairstyle.   
  
„That's what I'm asking you. She does not look like she liked that.“ Draco Malfoy had built up his entire size and looked Matthew contemptuously in the eye.   
  
„How do you want to know what she likes, hm? Mind you own business, asshole.“    
  
Draco clenched his fists and when Matthew turned back to Hermione he grabbed him by the collar.His voice was low.„I’ll just tell you once: You better fuck off now.“   
  
The dancing crowd froze dancing and formed a cluster around them. Harry emerged and huddled between the men. „What is going on here?“ His eyes fell on Hermione and he looked back and forth between them.    
  
Ginny hurried to Hermione’s side and put an arm around her shoulder. „Hermione, what’s wrong? Are you alright?“ She held her arm and trembled like aspen leaves, her lips whispering words too quiet to hear.   
  
Everyone looked at Matthew, who became nervous.    
  
„You know what? That’s ridiculous! I’m leaving.“ He walked past Draco but he pushed him back. „Man, what’s your fucking problem? Are you serious?“   
Draco opened one hand and his gaze was cold like ice. „Give it back.“   
  
The crowed had gone completely silent. Not a single person was breathing. Even the bartender was frozen in his motion.   
  
Matthew moaned and rolled his eyes. From his pocket he pulled a golden necklace that he threw to Draco. Hermione’s necklace. He shot one last gaze at Hermione and turned to the exit.    
  
Hermione was shaking all over. Harry and the bartender had already send most people home and Draco spoke softly to Ginny. He frowned. „Ginny, can you go to the backyard and bring Theo? Maybe he knows what to do.“   
  
The redheaded witch nodded and headed outside. Draco squatted and brushed Hermione’s hair carefully out of her face. „Granger, can you stand up?“ He tilted his head and when she didn’t answered he closed his eyes and touched his temples.   
  
Hermione was too lost in her palace. It was something she had trained in the last couple of years. Every time the pain got too big, she shut herself up. It helped, if only temporarily.   
  
Draco put his hand to her chin and pulled her head up to see her face. There was no light in her eyes. Almost whispering, he said „I’ll pick you up now, Granger.“    
He slipped his arm behind her back and lifted her legs up with the other. She was lighter than he had suspected. As he stood he saw Ginny returning with Pansy and Theo.   
  
„What happened?“ Pansy asked. There was a look on her face that seemed almost worried.   
  
Draco ignored Pansy and turned directly to Theodore, „Have you ever seen that, Theo?“    
  
The man’s face only knew a few expressions, but Draco felt how nervous he was.   
  
„Only once. When her father had passed.“ He looked from Draco to Hermione.   
  
Ginny grunted in between. „We have to get her out of here but she can’t apparate in this condition.“ She looked around to find Harry who spoke to the bartender. He was worried that Hermione would see her face in the paper tomorrow. „Our place is too far away and the Leaky Couldron is too famous. If we take her there, the press will besiege her. In worst case, Rita is already on her way.“ They looked at each other until all eyes were fixed on Hermione.   
  
Pansy groaned dramatically. „Okay, I know where we take her.“

 

~*~*~

 

As Matthew was outside of the bar a big grin appeared on his face. From the inside of his jacket he pulled a gold necklace. He lit a cigarette and the burning embers were the only thing that accompanied him through the night.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song of the chapter: BTS - Interlude: Wings


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song of the Chapter: Anne-Marie - Then

She drowned in the floods of her pain. The magic scar spread terror across her entire body and filled every inch with burning flames. There was a woman. A witch crouched above her, pressing her weight against her pelvis. She wanted to escape from her body. Slightly, it felt like she was watching from the outside. She saw herself being branded for the rest of her life.

 

Suddenly the scenery changed. What seemed to be a nightmare felt safe and secure. It was like standing on a white beach and watching the moon as it strode across the sky. The smell of fresh cut grass was in the air with a hint of parchment. She liked it and so she gave herself to the waves.

~*~*~

Her loud heartbeat pulled her back into reality. Her breath was fast and her eyelids fluttered. It took a moment for her eyes to get used to her surrounding and panic crept up her throat. Quickly, she searched for the usual pressure of her wand against her body, which was exactly where she had left it. She woke up with the expectation of finding herself in her bedroom, in the Nott estate. But this room had nothing in common with hers.

 

The wall was covered with a magical forest wallpaper. Hermione saw how the painted leaves swung with the wind and she saw butterflies and birds flying in the distance. She lay in a huge bed, the blankets and pillows kept in black and white, the sheets in a fresh green. A large window to her left flooded the room with natural light and Hermione wondered what time it was. The smell of lemongrass was in the air.

 

Her left arm felt hot and swollen. She did not know what exactly had happened last night, but whatever it was, she had slept fully clothed.  Headache and nausea plagued her and she wondered if she could go home without anyone noticing. The white door was heavy and she tried to open it as quietly and slowly as possible but a loud creak echoed through the corridors.

 

„Granger,  are you finally awake?“ Pansy Parkinson was standing so close to the door that Hermione almost squeaked when her brown eyes met hers. „I was on my way to wake you up for this rather late breakfast. Follow me.“ Pansy walked down the hall and then turned right.

 

So was she at the Parkinson house? To be true, Hermione had no clue where Pansy’s family lived. As kids they used to play at the Malfoy residence and quiet a few times at Nott’s place but never at the Parkinson’s.

 

Bent around the corner, the two were already in a large room that served both as a dining and as a living room. Through the large windows, that lead to the terrace, she could feel a gentle spring breeze. This room was also filled with light. For Hermione, these two things didn’t get along. The Princess of Slytherin, Ruler of the Dungeon and Lady of Darkness and this wonderful home, bright as the day.

 

The breakfast table was filled with all sorts of delicacies and Hermione noticed that the table was tiled for four, not only two people. Uncertain, she wondered if there was a chance she would not have to eat breakfast with Lady and Lord Parkinson.

 

„Sit down, Granger. Jeez, do you have any manners at all?“ The girl with the elf face signalized her to take a seat and Pansy sat down at the opposite side of the round table. Hermione took a deep breath and sat down, feeling a certain fear of doing something wrong. A feeling she had only experienced in her governess’ presence.

 

„So, where am I and what am I doing here?“ Hermione tried not to show how uncomfortable she was. Stay cool. A cool head is the key.

 

For a brief moment, a surprised expression laid on Pansy’s face until it was replaced by a small smile that caused Hermione to shudder. „This is my flat. You had something like an anxiety attack and your oh-so-careful friends wouldn’t want you to apparate, so, since the Dragonfly is just around the corner, we brought you here.“ Pansy folded her hands under her chin and stuck her eyes on Hermione’s.

 

An anxiety attack? It’s been months since Hermione had had her last one. She really thought she was over it. Why couldn’t she remember? „Thanks Pansy, it’s really nice of you that I was allowed to stay here.“ The room went quiet after that. Pansy just looked at her with a bemused expression. Hermione thought about something to say. „It’s pretty unusual for someone of your status not to live in you parental home. But it’s nice, I like it.“ She looked around and she had to be honest, this flat was stunning. Everything was color coordinated and nothing was left to chance.

 

„Well, that’s what I do for a living, I’m an interior designer. If you want to move in the future, let me know. I’m giving you mate’s rates. For old times’ sake.“ Pansy winked at her and Hermione felt a small smile on her lips that she immediately eliminated.

 

It was the smell of lemongrass that loosened Hermione’s tongue and before she could hold back, the question had already passed over her lips. „I saw Malfoy with a woman at Mrs. Frey’s spring ball, was that his girlfriend?“ With her last strength, she could give her question a triviality, in the hope that Pansy could not see through her. Hermione fixed her eyes on the teacup Pansy handed to her.

 

„Well, I guess you mean Magnolia Fawley?“ Pansy also just looked into her cup. „Blond?“

 

Wow, there were a few more women who would be eligible?

„Yes, she was blond.“

 

„That’s her. Their families arranged that. Lucius wanted the two families to have a closer relationship. I think they go out every now and then.“

 

Okay, so not his girlfriend but someone his family endorsed. Why would Hermione even care? He was terrible….terribly good-looking?

„Why do you ask?“ Hermione blinked and caught Pansy’s eyes and she looked like a cat who got the cream.

 

The door to her right opened and Hermione’s heart bursted. It was Malfoy, looking like he just came out of the shower. His hair was still wet and he wore an outfit that was casual for his standards. Black shirt with Black pants.

 

„Speaking of the devil, good morning Draco. I’ll go and wake Theo so we can finally have breakfast.“

 

Theo was here too? Did nobody really go home? How many bedrooms were there? Hermione wanted to leave.

 

„Never mind, Pansy, I wanted to go anyway. Thank you for your hospitality.“ Hermione quickly turned away from Malfoy and was already on her way to the door from which she originally came but Pansy stood in front of her, a terrible grin on her lips.

 

„Oh, no _Hermione,_ sit down and relax a bit. No skiving!“

Pansy roughly pushed her back into her seat and as the witch disappeared from the room, Hermione sighed loudly.

 

It was only when Malfoy took her cup of tea that she awoke from her rigidity. She watched him taking a sip, his wet hair fell into his eyebrows and she had to count to ten to escape the urge to put them back in their right place. He pushed a cup full of coffee to her.

 

„You only drink coffee, right?“ His eyes remained on his tea.

 

„Yes…thank you.“ How did he know that? Before their could eyes meet, she quickly looked at her hands.

 

„Can I see it?“

 

She blinked but did not want to look at him. She could guess what he was talking about. „I don’t know.“

 

„I need to see it.“

 

She took a deep breath and turned to him. Slowly, she pulled up the sleeve of her blouse without touching the sore flesh. She couldn’t say why she showed it to him. He was the last person she wanted to see it. And now there was not much of a choice. Either she looked at the scar on her arm or she looked at him. She didn’t knew which was worse.

 

Malfoy exhaled loudly and she was afraid that he was disgusted. The sight was uncomfortable and Hermione’s eyes burned with tears.

 

„This is very old magic.“ Only for a moment she dared to look at him before her eyes went back to the scar. „I think I have something that might help.“ He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small, red vial. „May I?“

 

Hermione’s eyes widened and, as if in a trance, she nodded once, very slowly. He put his slender, long fingers on her arm and Hermione felt her pulse rang in her ears. He traced every single line his aunt had forcibly carved into her skin. In her darkest hours, Hermione had pictured herself doing the same with him.

 

„Did your boyfriend hurt you in any other place?“ His eyes were still fixed on her arm, but Hermione saw him tense his chin.

 

„My…boyfriend?“  Hermione asked.

 

He looked into her eyes. „The guy who was with you yesterday"

 

She blinked. „Y-You mean Matthew?  He’s not my boyfriend and anyway, why would he hurt me?“ What was he talking about?

 

Before continuing, Malfoy paused for a moment. „…You don’t remember?“

 

„Pansy told me that I had a panic attack but what had Matthew to do with that?“ She needed to look at him. She had to keep her eyes on him. But she couldn’t.

 

Just as she finished her sentence Malfoy withdrew his hands from her arm. It was like someone had taken a weight off her shoulders but at the same time she was craving for more. She could feel his gaze and her breathing quickened. When he didn’t answer, her voice became louder. „What had Matthew to do with that?“

 

He bit on his lip and turned his face away. From his pocket he brought a golden chain which he put on the table. Hermione stared at it and her headache came back.  Her hand quickly reached to her throat, where the necklace her mother had given her usually rested. „My pendant!“ It was gone.

 

„He secretly took it from you, while he was fondling you.“ He clenched his fists. „I intermediated.“

 

The thoughts raced through Hermione’s brain. Matthew fondled her? Why would he? They had been living together for the last two years and he never tried to touch her. And why would Malfoy interfere? She picked up the necklace and looked at it more closely.

 

„I don’t know what your problem is, Malfoy, but this is _not_ my necklace. It does not even look like mine. I don’t know whose that is.“ She put the necklace back on its place on the table. „And I think you should withhold your accusations. Matthew is a really good friend of mine, he would never do something that would be inappropriate.“ She tried to hide the anger in her voice. Of course he wanted to take away the only thing that meant something to her . Of course he wanted to break the joy she felt. How stupid she was. She wanted to slap herself.

 

„You think I’m lying?“ His blue eyes lit up but his voice was controlled.

 

„I think you’re making things up because you can’t stand the truth that I deserve happiness too.“ And it was true. That was really what she thought and it hurt.

 

„So, and if I made it all up, what about your anxiety attack?“

 

„I think it was just not the best idea to not have dinner and then drink five margaritas.“ Keeping her eyes on something that was not him, she shrugged.

 

He chuckled. Hermione thought about the past four minutes and twenty-six seconds. No, nothing funny had happened.

 

„Can anyone testify to your allegations?“ She should have left when she had had the chance. Her eye twitched. Don’t look at him.

 

A smirk appeared on his face „Testify? Am I facing the Wizengamot, Granger?“

 

Why was he smiling? Was this funny to him? „So nobody has seen what happened except you? No evidence.“ Hermione swallowed.

 

He shook his head and stood up. The fact that he was now physically looking down on her made things worse. It required the biggest overcoming not to look at him. She thought again and again that nothing good came out of it if she did.

 

„I hoped that we could somehow be friends. Again.“ The sound of his voice felt like a raindrop falling from the ceiling. As soon as it reached her ear, it was gone. No reverb. No puddle.

 

Her voice sounded thin like sandpaper, a scratch on the floor. A whisper. „I can’t.“

 

She could never be his friend. She never will and, in fact, she never really was. There was always something else. Was is hatred or a longing in the corner of her heart ,that made her keep distance?

 

The door opened and Hermione immediately got up. Pansy and a very sleepy Theodore came to meet her. Malfoy turned away, his hands on the chair back.

 

„I need to go, Theodore. Thanks again, Pansy. “

 

Theodore exchanged a glance with Pansy before his eyes went from Draco to Hermione.

 

„Yes, sure. Follow me.“

 

She followed Theodore back to the hallway where he had come from. They stepped into a tea room which had a huge fireplace located on the left side, being devoured by green flames in the next moment.

 

Back at Nott estate they stepped out of the fire. Theodore looked at Hermione who stared at her arm, absentmindedly. There was so much going on in her head.  Her headache was back. She wanted to sleep.

 

„You have to understand him. He really tries.“ Theodore muttered.

 

Hermione turned to look him directly into his green eyes. Timidly, she touched his shoulder with her hand. In one corner of her brain, Hermione knew that they had had the same conversation before. On that one day when Draco Malfoy decided that a halfblood wasn’t worth a friendship.

 

„I can’t and I won’t.“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to correlia_art and my friend Ellie for adjustments and notes!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a short one but I hope you like it anyway!
> 
> Song of the Chapter: Apex Predator - Mean Girls

She had spent all Saturday and Sunday in her room. The big windows stood open and she leaned against the frame, her eyes on the woods. Yearning danced in the reflection of her eyes and she closed them to hide it. The coffee in her hand was steaming and getting colder every minute, but she had lost all sense of time. Hermione had planned to use the weekend to work intensively on her research, but after talking to Malfoy last morning, it was hard to keep focus. He wanted to be friends with her but could she do it? What would that look like? What would it feel like?  
  
Hermione wanted to answer these questions when she had the strength to face her feelings. For now she had to undo the mess she made in her room. Her necklace was gone. After noticing that it was not on her neck, she had searched everywhere for it, but couldn’t find it. That left a bitter aftertaste. She had received the necklace from her mother when Hermione came to the hospital to say goodbye to her. How can one explain to their child, that it would be the last time they’d see each other? Her mother had put it in Hermione’s small hands and held her tight. „You need to look after it. It’s the most important thing I own. I’ve got it from my mother and now I’m giving it to you.“ Her father had always blamed himself for her illness because his magic made her fragile and after Hermione was born it only got worse. Again and again, Hermione had lived through the last few minutes she had shared with her mother. The necklace has to reappear. It would tear her apart, if not.  
  
Hermione glanced at her research results and sighed. She just couldn’t make any progress. There was no way around working through the Nott library, and she knew that she would want to leave this property as soon as she was done.  
  
She walked to the library with her head up after she waved her wand to clean up while she was gone. The whispers of the portraits were irritating and inappropriate, but she tried no to be misled. But actually, on her way to the library was one particular picture Hermione liked a lot. The one of her grandmother.  
  
It wasn’t a big picture and even without a fancy frame, but it was there. Chelsea Granger, former Nott was the sister of Theodore’s grandfather, Carlyle, and Hermione saw her fathers eyes in her’s. The young Chelsea hold a book in her hand and smiled before her focus went back to the story she read.  
  
She strolled to the big doors of the library and took a deep breath. Yes, she had already been in there but that was even before her days at Hogwarts. Going into an unexplored library was like a new book, you don’t know what you’ll find and if the story might change you.  
  
Full of enthusiasm, she pushed the big door, which did not even move an inch. Locked. Hermione pressed her head against the frame and sighed. „Lil’?“  
  
There was a loud splash before the little house elf was standing right next to her. „You called for Lil’, miss? Is there anything Lil’ can do for you?“  
  
Hermionepushed away from the door and turned to the little elf. „Yes, Theodore allowed me to study in the library but it seems like the door is looked. Can you open it?“  
  
„Lil’ is sorry Miss but she can’t. Master Nott has all keys to the doors he looked.“ She locked at Hermione with her big, round eyes.  
  
„Where can I find him?“  
  
„He’s in the tea room, Miss, but Lil’ fears that he has a guest.“  
  
„It’s okay. I won’t bother him, I’ll just ask for the keys.“ Hermione smiled at Lil’ and set off to go to him.  
  
It was not until she was knocking on the door that she remembered that she did not knew who this guest was. It couldn’t be Malfoy, could it? Her stomach began to tingle and she tried her best to act relaxed. Why didn’t she just went to her room and waited until Theodore was alone? Why was it so hard to resist her impetus? When there was something on her mind she had to do itimmediately.  
  
The door opened by magic and Hermione’s eyes fell directly into the room. Her breathing quickened. Indeed, there was a Malfoy but not the one she hoped to see. Narcissa Malfoy sat with Theodore and enjoyed a cup of tea. What kind of a habit of her was it to break into situations involving one of her friends with a Malfoy? Why were they always everywhere?  
„Excuse me Theodore, I just wanted to ask for the keys to the library.“ Slowly, she took a few steps towards the table. „Good day Mrs. Malfoy.“ Hermione’s smile felt weird and fake and she knew she had to try harder.  
  
„Good day Hermione, it’s good to see you, would you like to drink some tea with us? Take a seat.“ Theodore did not seem to care that Narcissa was inviting her to sit with them in _his_ house. Hermione blinked at her and before she knew what she was doing, she sat down.  
  
Lil’ appeared and poured tea into her cup while exchanging the empty plate for one with fresh scones. Narcissa and Theodore resumed their conversation and Hermione shifted her weight, sipping on her tea. She tried to glance at Theodore so he could give her the damn keys and she could excuse herself.  
  
She almost choked when Narcissa spoke to her. „Hermione, dear, Theodore told me you’re doing some research for a personal project? What kind of research is that?“ Her voice sounded like honey and Hermione felt bad for a moment that she only gave her the cold shoulder.  
  
„Well, it’s a lot of looking into pedigrees and ancestor charts.“ The contest of her cup had a nice color, Hermione thought as she tried to dodge Narcissa’s gaze. Why was she so shy? Stand up for your views.  
  
„Oh, that sounds really interesting and what exactly are you looking for?“

She had not expected that Narcissa was seriously interested and therefore it could not be avoided, that their eyes met. Hermione’s tongue was faster then her brain. „I’m trying to figure out if there’s a connection between muggleborn and pureblood families. It may be that a common ancestor is responsible for the ability of magic.“ For some reason, Hermione had managed to express her thoughts while looking into Narcissa’s eyes. They looked a lot like her son’s but a bit darker.  
  
„You really are an extraordinary witch, Hermione. And are you doing well?“ She put her perfectly manicured hand to her chin as if she wanted to think about it.  
  
„I found some similarities in America but as the country is quite young, unlike England, the pedigrees came to nothing. Next thing I wanted to do is to look for clues in the Nott Library.“  
  
For a second, there was this certain spark in Narcissa’s eyes Hermione had seen on other Slytherins. She turned to look at Theodore.  
„I believe the records of the Nott family are all in our library, right Theodore? I recall that an uncle used it as a bet ages ago.“  
  
Theodore nodded.  
  
Hermione felt the familiar pain in her chest. The records weren’t here. She came here to read them. She had faced her fears and her past, certainly that they would provide the information she needed. But they were in the snake’s nest. From all places in the world, they were in her living hell. She tried to smile. „Oh that’s a pity."  
  
„I insist that you come visit us to look at them! “Narcissa’s eyes were so nice and tender that Hermione forgot what Narcissa had done to her.  
  
Her voice sounded strange as she spoke „That would be wonderful.“ She exchanged a look with Theodore and she could see her own amazement in his eyes. It meant risking or losing everything.  
  
„Are you free after work on Wednesday?“ There was something in Narcissa’s voice that sounded like she had won.  
  
„Yes, I think I can set that up.“ Hermione felt like she had missed something.  
  
And so, without realizing it, Hermione had a meeting with Narcissas Malfoy in the place that follows her even in her worst nightmares.

~*~*~

On Monday morning she found a lovely flower bouquet on her desk at work. They shimmered and radiated in different colors and filled the air with a sweet smell. It was stupid, but for a moment she had hoped that he had sent them. There was no particular reason why he would do it or why she would assume it was him but the little flame in her heart longed for it. She tried to extinguish it.  
  
They were from Matthew. Malfoy’s allegations had been absolute nonsense that were only meant to hurt her. And now Matthew felt guilty, because he had let himself be scared away by him. Hermione sighed and massaged her forehead. It almost felt like back in school. Just another setting.  
  
She had to apologize to Matthew. He didn’t deserved to be pulled into this stuff.  
  
Her first case directly required some of her attention but she was still absorbed in her work when someone knocked on her desk.  
Her head jerked and she looked into the smiling face of Ginny Weasley.  
  
„Hey, time for lunch?“ In her hand she held a brown bag, with the familiar logo of King’s Corner.  
  
Ten minutes later they sat together at Hermione’s desk, eating sandwiches and talking about the newest gossip when Ginny noticed the flowers.  
  
„Beautiful, aren’t they?“ Hermione smiled before she took another bite from her sandwich.  
  
She smirked and gave Hermione a meaningful look. „They really are. Did Malfoy send them?“  
  
Hermione almost chocked on her sandwich. „WHAT? No, Ginny. They’re from Matthew! Why would Malfoy send me flowers?“ Her cheeks flushed and Ginny’s grin only broadened.  
  
„I don’t know. Why was he so mad when you danced with Matthew?“  
  
„He accused him of fondling and badgering me…such a nonsense.“ She rolled her eyes.  
  
But Ginny put her sandwich aside. „To be honest, Hermione, it also seemed a bit too much to me but I thought you would say something if you didn’t like it. I was really scared when you became unconscious “  
  
So, even Ginny thought that something was off? Could it be that Malfoy was right? She sighed. No way. „Please remind me that I never drink so much again. I can’t remember anything.“  
  
„What do you mean by that?“ Ginny cocked her head and frowned, obviously puzzled.  
  
„Well, five margaritas were apparently way too much for me.“ She laughed but the sound died when she saw Ginny’s face.  
  
Her gaze was skeptical and her eyes wide. „Hermione, you had only one drink. You were already slightly drunk, that’s why we filled your glass with nothing more than water and enchanted it to taste like alcohol.You couldn’t have been so drunk that you don’t remember.“  
  
It was one of those moments when Hermione got the feeling she had missed the train on the track and all her friends went to Hogwarts without her. „But…why can’t I remember anything?“  
  
The two girls looked at each other and the answer was already swinging in the air. A shiver waved over Hermiones body.  
  
„It couldn’t be that someone poured something in your glass when we were dancing, right? Who would do such a terrible thing?“  
  
It was nothing more than a breath that left her throat. „A Slytherin?“  
  
„Hermione, no. I’m sorry but I have to protect him this time. Malfoy was and is an ass with too much ego, I agree. But he would never drug a girl. This goes too far. Even for him.“  
  
„You’re right. That’s no quite his style.“ Public exposure and insults on school corridors were much more of his specialty. „But I don’t think it was Matthew either. I know him, he would never do that.“  
  
„There were so many people and everyone had the chance to do it…“ A stifling silence settled over them.  
  
Hermione's mind was racing. Fuck. Even though Malfoy was wrong about Matthew, he was right about something being wrong. She had to apologize…Fuck. She had to thank him. Fuck.  
  
Ginny wanted to talk with Harry about it. Maybe the Auror Headquarter had already heard about similar cases.  
  
When Hermione went back to work, her thoughts were everywhere just not where they should be. Her fingertips kept patting her desk. Finally, she had to close her eyes and take a deep breath to concentrate. Within her, there was a struggle for reason and will. She had buried many things in the recent years. Her relationship with Ron, her never blossomed feelings for Malfoy and hope for a little luck. She wanted to do better. She wanted to clarify the things she had simply locked away for three years. She could’t be friends with him, no. But she could admit that she made a mistake and apologize to him. Yes, that would work.  
  
Before she changed her mind, she grabbed a piece of parchment, hastily scribbled on it, stuffed it into an envelope and wrote „Draco Malfoy“ on it. The magical letter floated from her hand and flew energetically to the elevator.  
  
She wrote:  
  
_Malfoy,_  
meet me tomorrow, 6 p.m, fiction section, Flourish  & Blotts.  
  
Hermione Granger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to correlia_art and my friend gnahfail for adjustments and notes!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been away for two weeks but I'll be back to post regular! I hope you enjoy this one, it's a bit tense.
> 
> Song of this Chapter: BTS - Don't leave me

She still had to choose a flat. The selection wasn’t very big and not very good. She sent an owl to two landlords to ask for a more precise expose and hoped it would make her decision easier.  
  
It was 5 p.m. and she had finished all her work for today. She looked at Susan, who had been playing nervously with her quill for more than half an hour. Hermione had another hour to kill, so she could do some small talk with the Hufflepuff girl.  
  
„Susan, is everything alright?“  
  
Her head jerked to Hermione, eyes wide and afraid. „N-no, I mean yes, why shouldn’t it be? Did you h-hear something?“  
  
„No, I was just wondering, since you seem to be a bit tense.“ She pointed to the quill Susan held in her hand.  
  
Susan laughed loudly and it sounded so weird that Hermione wondered if she had a mental breakdown.  
„Why don’t you go home for today? There is hardly anything going on and Maria has already left.“  
  
Susan stuffed her things quickly into her bag and stood.  
„That would be great Miss Granger! I-I’m leaving then!“ Her insecure smile still hung on her lips as she avoided Hermione’s eyes and ran towards the elevator.  
  
Well, so much for small talk. Hermione quickly summoned her pocket mirror out of her bag and checked her face. In fact, it didn’t matter what she looked like, right? Because she just wanted to say thank you, yes. But what can it hurt to look good while doing so?

~*~*~

She was way too early but it was important to her that she had some kind of advantage. Everything was going exactly as planned. Of course, she could have waited until she happened to meet him, but if she wanted to get it over and done as quickly as possible, she had to decide when and where they would meet.   
  
Hermione greeted the red haired witch at the checkout and went directly to the fiction section. As planned, she grabbed a book, opened a random page and leaned against the shelf at the end of the hallway. In that way, she could see him as soon as he came, but it didn’t look like she was waiting for him. What she did, though.   
  
Ten minutes in, she heard the bells above the door rang. Maybe that wasn’t a good idea at all. Maybe this was a really stupid idea.  
The old steps creaked and Hermione felt her heart nearly jump out of her chest. Her eyes were firmly fixed on the sites, her body as casual as possible. The footsteps came closer and passed by. It wasn’t him. She had to blink and acknowledge that this older man was certainly not Draco Malfoy. She sighed and began to wonder what she would do if he did not come. Her index finger pushed over her forehead. How embarrassing. Maybe he was too angry after she accused him…  
  
Then once again, she heard the bells. She swallowed hard and lowered her eyes to the book. The stairs sighed under the weight and she heard footsteps approaching her. He didn’t stop until he was standing right in front of her. His body pressed lightly against the book in her hands. She was constantly looking at his chest to avoid his gaze, she just couldn’t hold eye contact with him. He wore a dark gray pullover, probably cashmere, his shoulders covered by an olive green jacket. There she stood surrounded by books full of stories about brave heroes, too afraid to look at him.  
  
Her throat was dry. „Thank you for coming.“   
  
Malfoy stood too close to her, she could feel his warm breath as he spoke. „Pleasure.“   
  
The book in her hands closed without Hermione noticing. Quickly, she turned to go to the last shelf and stopped as she reached the farthest corner of the bookshop. Her back facing him. He followed her as if it was the most natural thing to do, stopping a few feet behind her. Her stomach clenched. A desire in her chest wanted to feel his body against hers.  
  
She bit her lip and turned, gaze straight on his shoes. Minutes seemed to pass before she started to speak.   
  
„I wanted to apologize for what I accused you of. I have learned that the situation was much more sensitive than I estimated it. It was premature of me to claim that you had bad intentions. I’m truly sorry for that and I want to say thank-"  
  
His sudden laughed send shivers through her spine. It was a dry, cold laugh. Just for a second she couldn’t resist herself and looked at him before her gaze went back to the floor. She could feel his body tense up.  
  
„Don’t you even dare to apologize to me, Granger.“ She winced. It was as if someone had thrown her into ice-cold water. He came closer. „Oh, this must be fun to you. I don’t want to hear any fucking apologies from you. Ever.“ His words were sharp as needles that rammed into her skin.  
  
With every step he took towards her, she tried to flow backwards until she felt the shelf against her back. Was he that angry that he wouldn’t even accept her apology? Or was it because she said that they couldn’t be friends? „I’m serious, Malfoy. I’ve gone too far and I sincerely apologize to you for that. I shouldn’t have blamed you.“  
  
He drew closer and closer and soon he stood right in front of her. She felt his eyes on her but she tried to focus on a book to her left. „Blame me, Granger. Blame me for everything you want but don't you dare to apologize to me after everything that had happened. I saw your scar and I’ll take all responsibility for that.“  
  
Hermione was trapped and she wished she hadn’t ask him to meet her. She narrowed her eyes in disbelieve „One has nothing to do with the other, Malfoy.“ For a second, she flinched as he pushed his hand to the spot next to her head.   
  
„Oh, everything has to do with that.“ He hissed through his bitten teeth. It was not bearable. He was too close. She turned to leave but his other hand shot up. He had pinned her.   
  
Her eyes burned as she tried to find her voice. „Let me go.“  
  
„Can you for _once_ look at me, Granger.“  
  
As if frozen, the only thing she felt was the rapid heart throb in her chest. Something fluttered in her stomach and she raised her head as slowly as she could. The moment their eyes met was like someone had stopped the time. His eyes were piercing blue and she was sure that he could see everything she was trying to hide. But still, his expression was unreadable like a book in a foreign language.  
  
Her voice was thin as the wings of a butterfly that tried to escape from the spider’s web. „Let. Me. Go. Please.“ She was sure that she would break any second and she did not want him to see it. Many years ago, she had been lying awake at night, hoping that she might someday be so close to him again. Now that the moment was there, she wished nothing more than to escape.  
  
His eyes burned into hers. „I need you to understand that you owe me nothing. Blame me for everything. Put all your hatred on me, I deserve it.“ He spat the words as if they were disgusting.  
  
Her eyes turned away. It was incredible that she was still able to speak. „I thought you wanted us to be friends.“  
  
„No. I said I _thought_ that we could be friends. But after seeing what I did to you, I think it’s best if we do not see each other again.“ His breath made her dizzy and she felt sick. So sick.  
  
„It…it wasn’t you. It was your aunt. You didn’t gave Harry away, even though you knew it was him.“ She didn’t wanted her voice to sound desperate, but she had gone too far, the abyss was near.  
  
He drew closer even though Hermione didn’t knew how that was even possible anymore. „What a nice story. Are you and your friends sitting together, talking about how great it is that Draco Malfoy is such a good guy in his heart? That he saved you all?“ His face was only inches away from hers and his eyes flickered between hers. „I would have let you die and I would not have been sad about that. I just didn’t feel like shedding blood that day.“  
  
And there it was. He gave her the reason to hate him she had been desperately looking for. The answer to the questions that she had been asking herself over and over again. Her stupid, sensitive heart often had told her that he had saved them because he had something left for her. Because there was still something left of the boy she once knew. Harry, Ron and Hermione were only alive because of his whims.   
  
Her hand raced through the air before she hit his cheek with full force. In disbelieve he pulled his hand back to touch the throbbing spot, freeing her from his gaze. She pushed past him and ran as fast as she could. Tears fell with every step she took.  
  
The apparition point had been behind her for a long time, but the pain in her lungs was much more pleasant than that of her heart, and so she ran and ran until she was exhausted.

~*~*~

She could not go back to her room. It was too dark, too foreign. Hermione didn’t want Theodore to see her and ask questions. He was not allowed to be pulled in this mess.   
  
Ginny opened the door as Hermione knocked. Her tears had dried and turned her face into a mess but they came back as soon she saw the expression on Ginny’s face. Her friend pulled her into a tight embrace. „Harry, Hermione is here and I think we need some wine!“, she called over her shoulder.  
  
Hermione was sitting on the sofa with Ginny, a glass of wine untouched in her hands. Harry was sitting across them, a puzzled expression on his face.  
  
„I don’t get it. I think you have to explain it again. He said he didn’t car if you had died?“ Harry asked.   
  
„Yes. I-I don’t know…everything happened so fast, I only wanted to apologize to him but he immediately snapped at me.“ Hermione looked at the ceiling trying to hold back the tears, crawling back up against her throat.  
  
„That can’t be true. He lied. Definitely!“ Ginny looked from Hermione to Harry and placed a hand on her friend’s shoulder.  
  
Hermione shook her head. „He seemed really serious about it. He made it pretty clear that he hates me…“  
  
„No! I saw how he cared about you when you passed out! He carried you all the way to Parkinson! Who would care like this about someone he hates?!“ Ginny was furious and poured herself a new glass of wine.   
  
„Malfoy carried me? No one told me!“ Hermione frowned and finally took a sip from her glass.  
  
Harry shifted in discomfort. „But Hermione, why do you even care so much about it? I mean it’s not like you ever liked Draco.“   
  
Hermione chocked on her wine and looked from Harry to Ginny.  
  
„Potter, you’re so stupid.“ Ginny rolled her eyes. „How could you not notice?“  
  
„What did I not notice? I knew that their had met before Hogwarts and so on but he has been mean to her all these years so I never thought that-“ His nose went pale and as he slowly looked at Hermione his eyes went wide under his glasses. „No way!“  
  
Hermione led herself sink into the cushions of the sofa and Ginny started to laugh.  
  
„You’re so slow, but I love you anyway.“ Ginny winked at him and Hermione felt her chest tighten.  
  
„But why did you tell Ginny and not me? When did all of this start?“ Now Harry reached for the bottle and poured himself a generous glass.  
  
Hermione sighed. „Nothing started. I liked him. Yes. It was stupid. But that was then and I decided to stop doing it.That’s it. I haven’t told Ginny anything, she found it out on her own.“ Another sip of wine could not hurt.  
  
Harry looked into his glass. „So all this years you had a weak spot for him and I didn’t realize it…bloody hell.“  
  
She sighed. „That was the meaning of the matter. Nobody should notice.“  
  
„Okay, besides that, what do you plan to do now?“ Ginny drew a bit closer.  
  
Hermione shrugged „There’s nothing to do. He told me that we should not see each other again. I respect that.“ But then Hermione made a surprised sound. „Oh, bullocks! I agreed to go to the Malfoy Manor tomorrow. FUCK!“ She clapped her hands over her mouth. „I’m pretty sure Narcissa won’t appreciate that I hit her darlings face.“  
  
„YOU HIT HIM??“ Ginny looked too happy about it. „That’s my girl!“ She raised her hand in happy expectation for Hermione to give her a high five. Hermione silently surrendered and accepted.  
  
„Just like third grade…“ Harry just shook his head, still a bit confused.  
  
„You have to go Hermione! Pump his mother and find out if he was really serious!“ Ginny clapped her hands. „Oh, and of course do your research!“  
  
Harry looked worried. „I don’t know…wouldn’t it be a bit wiser to take a little distance? In addition we speak about Malfoy Manor. Are you sure that you’re ready to go back to it?“ Hermione knew if it were the other way around, she would have given him the same advice. She sighed in despair.  
  
„I have to go. This is my chance to see the pedigrees. I can’t let this opportunity go unused.“ Hermione forced a smile.

~*~*~

When Hermione fell asleep at Grimmauld Place, she dreamed about him. She was back at Malfoy Manor, Bellatrix brought her to the ground. With the last of her strength, Hermione turned to look at him. He stood with his mother, a few steps away in front of the big fireplace, flames gushing from the inside. Whenever she remembered that moment, he stood with his back towards her. But this time she could see his face. Finally. As Bellatrix slammed the blade into her flesh she screamed in vein, not aware that it was her own voice echoing through the halls. Her eyes searching for him, begging for help.  
She did not know what was worse, the pain in her arm or that Draco Malfoy wore a big grin on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to correlia_art and my friend gnahfail for adjustments and notes!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apink - I'm so sick

Hermione sat at the breakfast table with Ginny. Harry was in the kitchen, making some sunny sides with bacon, when Hermione heard a tap on the window. A black owl sat on the windowsill, a silver letter in its beak. Ginny stood up and opened the window and the owl flew around the room until it dropped the letter into Hermione’s lap. Hermione froze, looking at the letter and then to Ginny. She swallowed. It was not necessary to look at the wax seal to know that the letter came from Malfoy.

Her thoughts began to race. A few seconds must have passed since Hermione started to stare at the letter, because suddenly Ginny screeched: „Open it!“

She tore the envelope open, pulled out the paper and read aloud:

 

_Granger,_

_my mother is not available today since she had an important appointment_ _that_ _she_ _cannot_ _move. She will contact you as soon as she is back to make a new appointment with you._

_Draco Malfoy_   
  


This was good news, right? She did not have to return to this place of horror. Not yet. But she could not continue working on her study. This was so sudden. Of course Miss Malfoy wouldn’t be pleased to invite a woman into her house who had slapped her precious son. Twice. She sighed before she read the letter for the third time. Her eyes wandered over the sheet and into Ginny’s eyes, who gave her a pleasing grin.

„Oh, shut up, Gin’!“ Hermione rolled her eyes, secretly packing the letter in her pocket.

 

„I’m not even saying anything!“ Ginny raised her arms defensively into the air.

~*~*~

The rest of the week passed by without another encounter with Malfoy. But that was mainly because Hermione left her desk just to leave or enter the building. She tried to bond with her co-wokers, and when they noticed that she ate lunch at her desk, they joined her.

Hermione learned that Maria was still looking for her dream prince by going on blind dates,  while Susan had had a boyfriend for some time. However, Susan was very uncomfortable talking about it. Her face flushed every time Hermione made even the slightest comment. She had to shook her head as she wondered what kind of guy her boyfriend was. But she was cute after all.

Hermiones work, on the opposite, proved to be less exciting. Most of the time she had to document small rule violations or record cases of the Wizengamot. Nothing world changing. Was that what Hermione wanted to do? She had always thought she would be able to make a difference if she had found her place in the Ministry. It was nearly impossible to convince her boss Higgs to give her a more serious case and Hermione had to emphasize once again that she was friends with the minister before he promised to think about it.

She met with Harry at noon on Thursday to discuss preparations for his marriage proposal. It wasn’t a hassle, but Hermione had to make sure to invite everyone without Ginny knowing, and since Ginny had her eyes and ears everywhere, it was not an easy task.

Harry had bought almost half of all seats in the stadium and Hermione got a little excited at the thought of it. How nice it must be if your significant other knows you so well and knows exactly what you want? A sad smile played around her lips and deep in her stomach she felt taunting anger.

Harry coked his head. „Is everything alright, Hermione? Still no luck with your research?“  
  
Oh, Harry… „No, nothing. Mrs. Malfoy has not answered yet and I don’t expect her to…“ Which was unfortunate, because even though Hermione wanted nothing more than to stay away from this place, it was necessary for her to get these pedigrees.

Harry straightened his back. „Maybe then I have some good news for you!“

She blinked and looked directly into his eyes. „Yes? What is it?“

„I talked to my coworker about your work and he recommended that you take a look into the Historical Records here in the archive! There should also be a personal directory there and maybe you’ll even find some pedigrees?“ He looked so happy because of the fact that he could help her, that Hermione touched his hand.

„That’s amazing, Harry! I didn’t even know that there was a department for that! How can I get access to it? I suppose there are security precautions.“ That were the first good news in days and a bright spot for her work.

Harry beamed at her and pulled something from the inside pocket of his jacket. „I have already brought you the form! If you fill it out now, I will submit it for you on my way back.“

She could smooch him! „Harry, you’re definitely the best!“

He laughed and scratched the back of his head. But suddenly his smile disappeared and Hermione saw how a small line of worry appeared on his forehead. „And…will you come on Sunday?“

Sunday was the second May. It’s been five years since the Battle of Hogwarts and to commemorate the dead, there was a big memorial service at Hogwarts. Harry was supposed to hold a speech and Ginny had told her that it was really important to him that Hermione was by his side. But that also meant, that she would definitely see Ron again.

She took a deep breath and tried to smile „Of course, I’m coming!“

There was another reason why she had to go. Some losses were only mourned by a few, in silence. That night, Theodore had lost his father, who had fought for Voldemort. Even though their relationship had always been distant and cold, Theodore had loved is father by heart. Hermione wanted to be there for him, even if it hurt.

Back at her desk, Hermione went through the invitations she was supposed to hand out. Harry had suggested that they just split the stack in the middle, but she saw that he had taken Ron’s invitation. Just in case that luck wasn’t on her side. And it wasn’t. And she sighed. _Draco Malfoy._

Hermione wondered if he had done this on purpose and threw the invitations in her bag. Oh, Merlin help me.

~*~*~

On Friday morning she had the approvals on her desk. She scanned all security regulations and requirements to borrow documents. Perfect. Without problems, she could take hame everything she needed over the weekend. Kingsley had given her the freedom to do so. Elated, Hermione went to tell Susan that she would antedate her lunch break.

The brown haired witch was especially nervous today. „S-sure Miss Granger, take a-as much time as you need.“

Hermione noticed that she had spread her elbows suspiciously wide over the Daily Prophet. „Is something wrong, Susan?“

Her fake smile was back and this time Hermione saw her mouth tremble. „No, n-nothing at…at all, Miss Granger!“

„Well, then…see you later?“ Hermione made a mental note to look into the newspaper. Better safe than sorry.

As she waited for the elevator she turned around once again, only to see that Susan looked away in panic. Hermione sighed. What was going on? She pressed the button of the elevator impatiently and was glad when it finally started to move.

The department of Historical Records was on level 9, the same floor she had visited in their fifth year to look for Harry’s prophecy. The black marble reflected her shoes that echoed through the empty hallways. Clutching her approvals firmly to her chest, she strode down the corridor until she stood in front of the right door. It was off the latch and so she decided to slip through it. As she turned around the corner, Hermione would have felt the need to laugh, hadn’t it been such a terrible sight.

Draco Malfoy stood behind the desk that served as a reception, in the arms of a blonde woman, _that_ blonde woman Hermione had already seen at the ball. She saw how Draco met her eyes in slow motion and she felt a knife in her heart turning. For a brief moment, she saw something like astonishment in his eyes, before he lowered his head to kiss the blonde’s cheek, his eyes still on Hermione. Goosebumps attacked her body. It crawled from her legs up to her chest, through her shoulder, into her arms. She saw him smirk before he whispered something into the blonde’s ear.

Startled, she turned and straightened her pencil skirt. Hermione suddenly felt underdressed. Magnolia, Hermione remembered her name, wore a white vintage blouse, paired with a light blue pencil skirt. She stroked her perfect golden hair behind her ear and put on a smile that even the angels envied. Magnolia’s cheeks were slightly blushed and Hermione decided that she hated her.

She came out from behind her desk „Oh, I’m truly sorry, I did not hear you coming. How unprofessional of me.“

Yes. Very unprofessional. Snugging at work? Some people actually try to get their work done here. Especially if they are here for private research. Hermione raised her eyebrows. „I’m here to look into some documents.“ She tried to focus on Magnolia, she would not waste another look at Malfoy.

„Of course, do you have the according papers with you?“ On her incredibly high heels, Magnolia approached Hermione. Her smile was gentle and soft, her curls played around her face. Stupid cow.

Wordless, Hermione handed the papers to her. Magnolia moistened a finger and checked through each piece of paper. Impatiently Hermione hooped from one foot on to the other, feeling the familiar burning on her skin. Malfoy was looking at her. Should she have greeted him? No. Nope. Never.

Magnolia inhaled sharply, her eyes twitched and Hermione knew exactly what would come next. „I’m so sorry Miss Granger, I did not recognize you! What a pleasure to finally meet you, I’m Magnolia Fawley, please call me Magnolia!“ The blonde witch grabbed Hermione’s hand and shook it softly, her touch felt like a r. She turned to face Malfoy. „Draco, why didn’t you tell me that this is Hermione Granger!“ And she was back to Hermione. „Draco told me so many great things about you!“

For a quarter of a second her eyes flew to Malfoy, before she corrected herself. „Oh, really? Somehow I can’t really imagine that…“ Hermione wondered what he had told Magnolia. In her imagination, they were both cuddled up in his bed as he spoke softly. _„You know, and that one time I could have let Hermione and her friends die but I just didn’t feel like shedding blood that day.“_ Oh, so romantic.

„Of course, I have received all the information for your project. Wait a minute, I have to look for the appropriate file to record the transfer. Excuse me for a moment.“ Before Hermione could beg her to stay, Magnolia disappeared into the next room.

Hermione sighed. She wanted to avada herself on the spot. Malfoy’s eyes were so intense that she had to look at him. She remembered the invitation in her bag and it took a moment for her to find it. Hermione fixed her eyes on it as she walked up to him. She  handed him the invitation. „Harry asked me to give this to you.“

For an alarmingly long moment, his hand rested on hers and she felt the crackle under her skin. She quickly pulled it back. His lips started to move and Hermione had to shut him of. „You don’t need to say anything, it’s all said.“

Malfoy raised an eyebrow and opened the invitation. Hermione dared to look at him because she knew he would not see it while he read the letter. His pale, porcelain-colored skin looked like it had been sculptured, as if an artist had created his perfect cheekbones and contours to immortalize a work of art. More than anything else, she wanted to touch his face. But her eyes widened as she noticed her thoughts. Of course, she was still angry at him and desperately she tried to hate him for the things he had said. There was a hole monologue she had thought of for this particular moment. But for what reason? Why should she fight this battle? He made it pretty clear that there was no place for her in his life. She would stay away and keep silent. At least that was the plan.

Magnolias heels echoed across the room as Hermione’s chest paced up and down.

Hermione saw his lips starting to move as Magnolia finally returned. Before he could say anything, her voice danced through the room. „Follow me, Miss Granger, I’ve prepared everything for you.“ Malfoys sparkling eyes were on her as she followed Magnolia down the long corridor. It wasn’t until Hermione was sure that he was out of sight that she felt the air in her lungs again. She was at a loss what was going on here.

~*~*~

An hour and a half later, she had all documents she needed for her work. The archive had many family trees from newer wizard families and a few of those that had already died out. There was even a pedigree from the Potters. Her finger danced over the magical letters that formed his name. The Weasley family tree was a thing of its own. It could be folded around five times and Hermione needed six attempts to get it right. It wasn’t easy to see Fred’s face. George and she have had no contact ever since she had broken up with Ron, but she wondered how he was doing. The second May was only a few days away and thus Fred’s day of death.

All the documents were protected from spells and so she had no choice but to carry as much as she could.  Magnolia and Malfoy were still standing at the desk, talking quietly. Did neither of them had work to do?

„Oh, incredible, Miss Granger! Did you find what you where looking for?“ Her smile was contagious. Dull bag.

Hermione tried to make a nice expression. „Yes, kind of. It’s enough to continue.“

Magnolia began to transfer all copies in a leather book, when a blond strand of her hair fell from her shoulder. Inevitably, Hermione blinked to Malfoy. His gaze rested on the same spot she had just looked at on Magnolia before their eyes met. Her heart was suddenly 100 pounds and she looked away.

„There, that’s everything. Please return the documents back within one week. Here is your receipt.“

„Excellent, thank you!“ Hermione quickly began to clear everything together and lifted it to her arms. Just get away quickly.

„Draco, since you just wanted to leave, why won’t you help Miss Granger on her way down?“

Hermione felt her veins freeze. „That’s really not necessary.“

But the gentleman he was, he already began to load his arms with documents. He turned to kiss Magnolia on the cheek, his eyes once again on Hermione and she felt the urge  to vomit. „See you.“

She sighed and went straight to the elevator. The grating creaked as she tugged it open and waited for Malfoy to get in before pulling it shut. If it hadn’t been too rude to rip the documents off his hands, she would have told him to mind his own business. Slowly she tried to push into the last corner, as far away from him as possible. But somehow, she could not shake the feeling that the elevators were usually bigger. Oh sweet luck, where have you gone?

She jumped as Malfoy pushed his arm past her to press the button.  How could she forget to press the damn button? But how did he knew where she had to go? Coincidence? An initiated silence spread in the elevator and Hermione felt the tension in her body. She was trying to think of something unimportant that had nothing to do with him, when he started to speak.

„You’re coming on Sunday?“

She nodded.

„I heard the Weasley boy will be there too. Are you okay with that?“

Hermione tapped the floor with her toe. Faster. She mumbled. „None of your business.“

Malfoy chuckled. „It is. I need to know if I have to bring popcorn.“

Of course. What fun it must be for him  when she’s feeling bad. A raging applause for Hermione, idiot of the year. She cursed every second this miserable elevator needed. Her eyes were fixed straight ahead. Faster.

But of course he could not stop it. „I’ve heard that he has a new girlfriend. Have you already made yourself known?“ She heard the smirk on his lips and her patience snapped.

Hermione turned to face him, her cheeks red. „WHAT IS YOUR BLOODY PROBLEM, MALFOY?“ Astonishment crossed his face before he regained his mask. „You made it pretty clear that you do not want to have anything to do with me, so why can’t you just shut up?!“ Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew that she should’ve just endured it. „I’ve enough of this! You think you could treat anyone the way you like, but I will not let you do this to me! So shut your mouth!“

The elevator door opened with a ping and she tore the documents out of his hands before she lurched out. Susan ran up to her and took something from the stack.  
Silence.   
  
No footsteps. He withdrew and she was relieved that he didn’t go after her. One last time she turned her head to look at him. The scars she tried so hard to stitch together over the past few years just wouldn't heal. His stupid grin was gone. Maybe now he realized that he had to play his sadistic games with someone else. She hoped he would. Before he was out of sight, she stomped away to her desk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the lack of updates. I'm actually already writing chapter 16 but I moved flats last weeks and still have no proper internet connection to send my friend everything for adjustments! D:


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is very special to me. <3 Thank you so much for all the Kudos and comments, they mean the world to me!

Something was pushing against her face. She knew it wasn’t a pillow because it was hard and not comfortable at all. Her eyelids fluttered as the first sunbeam reached her eyes and she saw the last memory of her dream fade away. She had spent all Saturday reading pedigrees and directories, staying up until late in the night to update her results. It wasn’t  new, earth-shattering knowledge, but now she could imagine a little better how the wizarding world unfurled its roots. However, she was aware that only the pureblood, old pedigrees could tell her what she was looking for. Of course, the Weasleys were also purebloods but it always happened that here and there a Muggle had married into the family.  
  
Slowly, Hermione pushed away from the table. For Godric’s sake, she had fallen asleep. What time was it? The hands on her magical watch rested just before nine. Too late. Bloody hell. Hastily, she ran into the bathroom and muttered a spell that made sure that the brushes began to straighten her hair. With  _ accio _ she grabbed her bra, tights and the black dress she had chosen for this special day.

Before she was ready to leave, she looked at her reflection in the mirror again. After the war, Hermione had returned to Hogwarts to graduate with Ginny. It had been weird without Harry and Ron, between all the rubble and all the memories but it also had been somewhat comforting. A certainty that it was really over and that the only thing that could kill her now was the pain in her heart. Another deep breath and Hermione was on her way into the entrance hall.

Theodore was standing at the foot of the stairs, fixing his cufflinks. He turned towards her when she reached the last step. Carefully, she pulled him into a hug. „Are you alright?“

There was no expression on his face. „Yes. Let’s go.“

He turned to go to the fireplace. Hermione reached to grab his hand. Something she had always wanted to do when they were younger, when he needed comfort or someone to rely on. For a moment, she could feel him hesitate, unsure if he can include someone into his grief. Hermione had run away long enough. She wanted to be there for him now, just like he had been there when her father had died and she had been torn away from everything she knew.

Hermione did not let go of him and so they went into the fire together, back to the place where everything had started and everything ended. The floo network took them to Hogsmead, from where they were taken by carriage to Hogwarts. It was only then, that Hermione noticed that now nearly all her former schoolmates could see the Thestrals that pulled the carriage.

The carriage stopped in the large courtyard. Numerous former students, professors and relatives had gathered and Hermione recognized some familiar faces among them. She said hello to Luna and her father, Dean Thomas, Professor Slughorn and Kingsley, before her eyes fell on Parvati and Padma Patil. The two women stood under a balcony and Hermione saw how Padma wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. They had lost their best friend Lavender Brown back then.

Shyly she approached them. „Hello Parvati, Hi Padma. How are you doing?“

Without hesitation Padma squeezed Hermione in her arms. „Oh, Hermione, I’m so happy that you came! Of course, the stars have already told me that you would, but still! Hello!“

Parvati pulled Padma with a sigh from Hermione and greeted the witch with two kisses on the cheek. „Relax, Padma, Hermione already feels uncomfortable. How are you, my dear? Where’s your charming companion from last time?“

Oh right, Hermione remembered Parvati’s flirt attack. „You mean Matthew? He’s not here today, he’s from Ilvermorny.“

Parvati blinked. „What, he didn’t go to Hogwarts? Really? I was sure that we had met before. His face was so familiar to me?“, she asked curiously. Her long, manicured finger tapped against her chin and Hermione saw how she was thinking.

„You’ve probably seen him at another event before. Matthew comes around a lot.“, she remarked. Hermione had not heard from him since the flower bouquet and made a mental remark to send him a text message afterwards.

The light in Parvati’s eyes flickered and she looked over her shoulder. “By the four founders, I lost him again!“

Padma followed her gaze and searched the crowd. „Your boss?“

Wow, even today she worked? „You’re here again with your boss?“ , Hermione wondered.

The young witch stormed her hair back over her shoulder and rolled her eyes. „Yes, we actually have to clarify some important dates for next week. Padma, do you want to come?“ She said goodbye to Hermione with kisses on both cheeks.

Alone again, Hermione searched for Theodore. Presumably he had gone down to the dungeons with the other Slytherins and she certainly didn’t want to go down there. Her eyes stuttered over the crowd when she saw Rita Skeeter. She was deeply engrossed in an interview and Hermione got sick when she saw that it was Ronald she was talking to.

He was taller and a bit more muscular than she remembered. He wore a black suit, no tie, and his ginger hair was elegantly styled. Ron looked like a man and if she hadn’t been so bitter, she would have to admit that he looked really handsome. The two seemed to be talking about something pleasing, because whenever Skeeter asked him something, he laughed. Hermione wanted to slap his grin from his face. Skeeter apparently sensed Hermione’s gaze and she cursed everything and everyone as Skeeter pointed in her direction.

Their eyes met. Hermiones heart convulsed. She could feel a bitter taste in her mouth. The taste of remorse and anger. He smiled gently and she saw pity in his eyes. Pity for her? Hadn’t  she cut off all feelings at that moment, she would have laughed. She saw his hand lift and his lips formed a silent „Hi“. Save that. She turned and went inside.

Her heart was pounding against her chest so badly that she felt dizzy. Pity? Fuck you and your pity. I don’t want it, Hermione thought. She hurried down the corridor, and only when she felt safe, she stopped her steps. The pain in her chest was so overwhelming that she had to support herself against the wall.

After the events that had happened five years ago, they both had felt bad. Ron had lost his brother and Hermione her feeling of self-worth. There was no comfort in his sighs and she could not give him back what he had lost. She wanted to go back to Hogwarts, she had to go back. Along with Ginny, she decided to graduate, despite Ron’s efforts to dissuade her. More and more did Ron try to tie her up. He had talked about marrying and moving in together, although Hermione felt more and more that she had no room left. Ron sought the kind of comfort in Hermione that she could not give him in her condition. The pain in their hearts made them both mad and in her last days before going back to Hogwarts, he had repeatedly harassed her so much that she screamed at him to get off her. She did not want to sleep with him and Ron got madder every time she refused. He told her that it was the only way to quench the pain. When they had waited for the Hogwarts Express to depart, she promised him that they could start again after this year. She had kissed him one last time and he held her in his arms, for as long as he could. Ron unexpectedly wrote countless letters to her in which he told her how much he loved her and what they would do when she graduated. Every time a nightmare gnawed at her mind, she sat down at the window and read one of his letters. But with a heavy heart, she noticed that sometimes she hid his name and imagined that someone else would wait for her. She loved Ron, of course she did. But her heart always longed for Malfoy, even though it was promised to someone else. She had banished that yearning to a corner of her heart she had closed but sometimes she still heard the knocking.

It wasn’t until April when Hermione realized she had been fooled. The front page of the Daily Prophet was full of photos of women Ronald had cheated on her with during the past few months. They had all turned to the press after learning about each other. Only Hermione wasn’t privy.

“Granger, what’s wrong?“

She blinked and realized that she was crying. Her hand raced to her face and she tried hard to cover her tears. Theodore strode towards her and Hermione turned her face away when she noticed that he was with Malfoy and Pansy.

„Everything’s alright. Just…emotions.“ She muttered. Blinking away the tears. Fuck.

„Did that stupid Weasley say something to you?“ Malfoy’s voice sneered through the corridor and Hermione knew that tone. It was the same tone he used to call her names with. She remembered how Pansy had laughed loudly and was only inciting him to say more.

„No. I-I have to go. The speech, I need to find Harry…“ She whispered before she turned and walked away. The pain couldn't roll over her today. The pain would stay in his miserable corner and wait for her to bring it out. She had to be there for too many people. So much for wanting to be there for Theodore. Wills and skills are still two different things.

She wasn’t sad at all. Hermione was shattered.

The large forecourt was filled with hundreds of people and Harry stood by the stairs leading up to the small stage. She hugged Ginny and Harry and stiffened when she realized that Ron was with them as well. It was awkward but she knew it wasn’t the time or the right place to fight her battles and so she said the only thing that came to her mind. „Today is not a day to fight, so don’t talk to me.“, before she turned away from him. Her moment would come.

McGonagall, the new Headmistress, began the funeral service. She talked about the changes that have happened since the war and how proud she was of the new generation of witches and wizards she was allowed to teach. Next up was Kingsley. He repeated the details of the night and expressed his condolences to all families and students who had lost friends or relatives in the battle.

She took a deep breath. It was Harry’s turn. Ginny kissed him before Harry climbed to the stand. The mumbling of the people made the hair on her skin stood and she was sure she saw  Rita Skeeter licking her lips from the corner of her eye. Ginny and Hermione went to the edge of the first row.

Harry unfolded the paper with his speech. Hermione’s heart felt heavy and her throat sore. The crowd went silent.

His two hands rested on the desk as his magically amplified voice was carried through the air.

„I remember seeing this wonderful castle for the first time. We came with the boats across the lake and if you had told me back then that this castle would be in ruins before my graduation, I would not have believed you.“

He turned around to look a the castle, a smile on his lips.

„I’ve been thinking for a long time what I wanted to say today. Of course, I could talk about how I faced Tom Riddle that night, or how we destroyed the last Horcruxes. But we’ve all heard that often enough and actually that’s not why we’re here today.“

The traumatic events of that night were burned into Harry’s heart. Hermione could only guess which demons were haunting him at night. His chest raised and lowered slowly before continuing.

„Today is dedicated to those who have given their lives to stand up for what they believed in. Today is dedicated to Remus Lupin, who not only fought in the first wizard war as well, but who taught us, that it is the quality of one’s convictions that determines success, not the number of followers. Today is for Nymphodora Tonks, a brave, dependable and selfless witch, who risked everything. Both left behind a wonderful child, my godson. Today is for Lavender Brown, my former classmate.“

His voice started to tremble a little and in the distance Hermione could hear Lavender’s mother sobbing. The crack in her heart twitched.

„Lavender kept her eyes on the sky, hoping that the stars would tell her what was coming. She was passionate and had a kind heart that made it easy for her to find friends.“

The pain in Hermione’s throat pressed against her neck. But she didn’t want to cry. The scar on her arm started to burn..

„Today is for my friend Colin Creevey. He came back to Hogwarts even though he had been  evacuated along with the other minors.“

Her eyes wandered to the left and she saw a single tear rolling over Ginny’s cheek.

„He was such a brave, young wizard. I’ll never forget how he took his first photo of me. Colin always stood by my side.“

She shouldn’t have done it, but she turned her head to see Colins parents with his little brother. Oliver Wood stood with them and Hermione remembered how he had carried Colin’s little body into the great hall. It was too late. Her heart shattered and she had to give in. Slowly, she turned her eyes back to Harry. With every blink, more tears poured down her face.

„Today is for Fred Weasley.“

He stopped and took a deep breath. The sight made Hermione shudder.

„Also an incredible talented wizard, but Fred….had that special ability to make you think that  _ anything _ is possible if you've got enough nerve."

Ginny began to sob and the throb in Hermione’s arm grew stronger. She would not last long.

„Never did Fred say that something was impossible or a bad idea. Fred was always ready to risk everything for the right thing.“

How could they stand that? Hermione had to leave before she broke up. She turned to walk but someone pulled her back on her right wrist. Her head sped around and she looked into the ice-blue eyes of Malfoy, who was clutching her wrist. Enraged, she tried to free her hand, but he only shook his head and pointed to Harry. Who does he think he is, forcing her to stay? He held her gaze and she tried to calm down. Hermione was distracted when she heard her name.

„And where would I be today if I had not met Hermione Granger?“

She tried to listen to Harry, but Draco, who still held her wrist, was standing close behind her. Hermione felt his breath on her neck and the smell of fresh cut grass was in the air. Her heartbeat calmed and it was easier for her to breathe. Was this occlumency?

After a while, his hand continued to move down and as he intertwined his fingers with hers she heard him take a deep breath. She let it happen. His hand was warm and she felt his steady heartbeat at her back. No idea why he did it, but Hermione found comfort in that gesture.

Only when the crowd applauded did Hermione remember where she was. With panic in her eyes, she turned, but Malfoy was gone. Did her anxiety trick her? Her gaze found Ginny’s, but the red-haired witch did not seem to notice anything strange. She felt her heartbeat in every inch of her body. The pain in her scar was gone. Did she imagine that? Slowly, she turned one last time but Malfoy was not in sight.

„Let's go to Harry, Hermione!“ Fleetingly, Ginny wiped the tears from her face and took Hermione’s hand, which had been held by someone else shortly before, right? She wasn’t sure and so she focused on her steps.

As Harry descended the stairs Ginny threw herself into his arms. Hermione could not hear what she whispered in his ears but his warm smile was full of love. In only a few days, he would propose to her and Hermione couldn’t deny that she was a bit jealous, but as long as you grant it to your friends, there was nothing wrong with that. Before it was Hermione’s turn, she looked around for Ron. But since he was nowhere to be seen, Hermione guessed that Harry told him to stay with his family and he would come to them afterwards. They hugged each other for a long time.

„Thank you for your kind words.“ Even though she had not quite heard the part about herself.  
  
„Every word was true. We would all have been gone without you, Hermione.“ He put a hand on her shoulder and smiled.

Hermione wondered when he had become so grown up. Harry did not have a problem with presenting himself in public and, despite all that had happened, not being victimized. She had always expressed her beliefs. Also in front of big crowds. Also in front of her enemies. But lately, the expression of compassion was hard to bear. She was torn. She wanted to be noticed and seen. She wanted to change something. She wanted her voice to be heard. But she was afraid to break. And worse, she was afraid to be seen while doing so.

After Ginny apologized herself to go to her family, Harry came a little closer. „Did my eyes fool me or did I just see Draco with you?“

Her eyes went wide. No hallucination.

„So you gave him the invitation?“ His lips opened to a smile. He spoke softly.

Hermione narrowed her eyes. „Oh, so you really gave it to me on purpose.“

„Of course, I think you two should urgently speak out.“

„I don’t think so. I disturbed him with his girlfriend at their little rendezvous at work on Friday." Hermione rolled her eyes. So unprofessional.

"You mean Tulip?“

Hermione chuckled. „Her name is Magnolia, Harry, but yes, with her. She's working at the department of Historical Records.“ And that meant that Hermione would see her again tomorrow, when she brought the documents back. Great.

An expression of surprise crossed Harry’s face. „She’s working there?“

„Yes, if you want to call it that.“

„And you caught them while smooching?“ He frowned.

„Yes, Harry. I really don't want to to think about it that much.“

Harry looked visibly confused but happy. „Okay, first of all, she’s not his girlfriend. I asked him and he told me. Secondly, he knew you would be there.“

Now Hermione was confused too. „What?"

„He was the one who told me that this archive exists. He came over on Thursday morning and brought me the form so you could fill it out when we meet for lunch.“

Hermione stared at Harry, her eyebrows pulled together.

„In the afternoon he picked it up from me and brought it to Kingsley, so you’d definitely get access on Friday. He asked me not to say anything to you and I suspected he did not want you to think that he would interfere.“

„But that would mean…“ Her head spun.

„He knew exactly that you would go to the archive as soon as the registration was on your desk." She saw in his eyes how he understood something that Hermione didn’t.

„Hermione, if he knew you were coming and he made out with her anyway, he probably wanted you to see it.“

Shock raced through her body. "Oh god, do you think he knew that it would hurt me?“ Did he knew something about the shadow in her heart? Hermione wanted to sink into the ground. She felt her cheeks turn red.

„No one understands Draco, but I guess he was hoping that you would be jealous.“

Hermione was rocksolid. She still felt his hand in hers and her heart raced in her chest. No, that can’t be true. Why should he care? He played a game as usual, no matter who he harms, the only reason is that he enjoys it. A flash to her left pulled her out of her thoughts.

Skeeter came out of the cloud of smoke and she looked like a wolf killing a sheep.

„If that’s not two-thirds of the golden trio. May we take a photo for the front page?“ Her voice dripped like honey. Hermione wondered if she was the bear or bee. She was about to say no when Harry jumped in on her.

„Sure!“ Harry beamed and Hermione felt her facial features derailed. He put his arm around her waist and gave her a meaningful look before he smiled broadly. Hermione took a deep breath and tried to do the same.

„Hermione, dear. Do you feel inspired by Harry’s emotional appeal? Of course, we all wonder when we can finally see what changes you have for us."

It’s been only two weeks since Hermione came back. What did they expect from her? She cleared her throat as Bozo still took pictures of them. „Well, I'm in charge of a number of court cases in the Ministry and besides, I am still working on my own projects.“

„And by own projects you mean that you would like to start a family?“

Terrified, she dug her fingers into Harry’s back. She would like to bump her fucking Quick-Quotes Quill in her eye. "No, I am working on a research to investigate the appearance of muggleborns.“

„Oh, really interesting and say, is there a man in your life right now?“

Was this woman totally crazy?! She should not answer such a silly question, especially on this kind of occasion. „No, I'm not seeing anyone at the moment.“

„So you're the only one of the golden trio who still has not found the big love? It must be hard when everyone around you starts to settle down."

Did Ron really have a new girlfriend? Why should something like that define Hermione? Was she worth less just because she was single? „I don't think that this is anyone's business“, she barked.

„Oh, my dear child." Skeeter drew closer to Hermione and she could feel her intrusive perfume. „Everything about you is of concern to my readers.“ She flicked her finger and Bozo finally stopped taking pictures. "We have what we wanted, let’s see if we get a good picture of the Browns.“ Skeeter ordered and turned to walk away.

Hermione carefully pulled away from Harry and gave him a quick smile before she went back inside. That was too much information at once. She needed some distraction. The sun slowly settled on the horizon and Hermione wondered what time it was. Because before she wanted to go home, there was another place Hermione had to visit.

Slowly she pushed the doors of the library open and the smell of thousands of books released a bunch of butterflies in her stomach. It did not surprise Hermione that is was empty and lifeless. She greeted Mrs Pince who, as always, said nothing to her. Hermione had spent countless hours here. When she had felt lonely and foreign in the beginning, she had found solace in the many stories. Stories about heroines and witches who did not care where they came from or in which house they were sorted. Gently, her fingertips slid over the old bindings before she stopped and looked at her palm. It was as if she could not grasp what was in front of her.

Malfoy had bullied, humiliated and injured her. Neverless, her eyes had always searched for him. Still, every time she closed her eyes she had his face in mind. The first years were the worst. He became more and more aggressive and ruthless and when their eyes met, his gaze was cold as ice. His quarrels with Harry pushed her into the field of fire.

She knew who would be sitting at the table in the corner. He had often sat there and she had often stood right here, behind this shelf, watching him over her book. Sometimes he had been with Pansy or Theodore, but always reading. Every time his long, slender fingers delicately turned a page she could guess at his face if he was pleased or not. She felt self hatred rise. It was an eternal fight. An eternal fight between her brain and her heart.

And there he was again, his blond hair falling in his face and a book in his hands. It was the first time since those days that Hermione could look at him alone. Normally, she ran away from him or avoided looking at him, but this time she could enjoy it. Only for a moment she would give in to her longing. She wished she could just look into his mind for a moment. Only for a second, guess what he thought and felt. Did he really hate her? Why did he push her away and still somehow seek her closeness? What did he care? Why did he push himself into her life just to shut her out? Was that the reason? Did he befriended Harry because of that? To show her that she was not welcome?

Jerkily, Malfoy raised his head and Hermione scurried behind the shelf. She tried to breath as quietly as possible when she heard footsteps approaching. The footsteps came closer and Hermione swore under her breath as she recognized the shoes that stopped in front of her.

As she raised her gaze and looked into Theodore's face, she pressed her index finger to her lips. “Please do not betray me”, Hermione whispered. Theodore could see Malfoy from his point of view without Malfoy seeing Hermione. Something stirred in his eyes and Hermione’s heart broke. She swallowed hard. A very long time ago, she had sworn to him that she had forgotten Malfoy. He had caught her. His eyes burned with disappointment. He knew.

Quietly, she slipped past him and out of the library.

It was time to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to correlia_art and my friend Elli for adjustments and notes!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the lack of updates. I have another personal project I have to work on atm but I finally have some days off in the begining of september and I hope to update a lot <3! Thank you so much for leaving kudos and your comments! I appreciate all kind of criticisms!

It was late in the evening when Hermione went back to the Nott estate. After a lot of small talk and after saving herself from getting a full-time job at Hogwarts from McGonagall, she managed to get home. The green fire sparkled in thousand sparks as it let her to her destination, and Hermione was startled as she saw that the doors of the middle wing were completely open.

This was bad. The middle part of the estate was the part Theodore’s father used to live in. Had Lil left the doors open after cleaning up? But all doors stood open and Hermione could even look into the garden. Her brown eyes flickered through the darkness. Maybe it had been too much for Theodore to bare? She was about to call for Lil when she noticed the outlines of a person in the distance. Reluctantly, she stepped closer, narrowing her eyes to see better. It was Theodore.

He came to a stop and swung his arm up when he noticed her and called. „Granger you stupid bint! Come out here for a bit and have a drink with me!“ The glass in his hand found it’s way to his lips before he disappeared from her view.

She sighed and pushed her hair back. If he wanted to drink, someone had to look after him before he accidentally crashed into the pond. As Hermione walked through the halls of Theodore’s father, she became queasy. As a child, this part of the house had been taboo for her.

She stepped into the cold night air. Even though the days were already quite warm, the nights clinged at the cold wind of spring. Hermione shivered. Theodore sat on one of the lowest steps of the stone porch. 

He wasn’t alone and Hermione felt uncomfortable at once.  On the highest landing of the stairs, Malfoy leaned casually against the railing, holding a glass of whiskey in his hand, the other hidden in his pocket. His blond hair seemed almost white in the light of the moon.

As if in a trance, she watched as he led the glass to his lips. His skin looked like porcelain, as if it had been made of clay just to look at it. Hermione could only guess how his skin would feel. When his eyes found her, he paused and sank his arm without taking a slug.   
  
“Good evening, Granger.” Malfoy’s voice cut through the darkness.   
  
And as if that was not enough, Hermione noticed someone shifting at the other end of the stairs, close to Theodore. Without a doubt, Hermione would recognize Pansy's elfin profile everywhere, even now when the moon was the only source of light shining above them. But Hermione could have sworn that her eyes were a little swollen, almost as if she had been crying. The thought made her even more uncomfortable. Theodore was in perfect company. If only she had stayed inside.    
  
Hermione's voice sounded strangely unfamiliar. “I did not know that there was a party going on here.”   
  
Pansy snorted contemptuously. Slowly, without looking in Malfoy's direction, Hermione descended the steps to Theodore. It was too late to turn back.  “Are you alright Theodore?” She whispered as she pushed her dress under her bum and pulled her knees close to her chest.   
  
“Mhm.” Theodore murmured before he took another sip from his glass and passed it to Hermione.   
  
Her neck tingled as the alcohol flew down her throat. She was no help to Theodore as long as the snakes were with him. For all involved, it would be best if she could find an excuse to leave as soon as possible. Hermione looked over her shoulder to Pansy who watched her closely, obviously Hermione wasn’t welcomed at all.   
  
She leaned closer to Theodore, hoping the other two would not hear her. “I see you’re doing fine. I’ll go to sleep now, don’t drink too much, okay?”    
  
But before she could stand up, Theodore pulled her down again. “No, stay!” He exclaimed. “You need to stay a bit more!” His breath made clear that he had already drunk a lot more than Hermione had first assumed.    
  
“Okay…” She whispered. His eyes nearly pierced into her and Hermione noticed that Theodore looked much younger than usual. “I’ll stay for a while but then I’ll go, alright?”   
  
Satisfied, Theodore nodded expansively before taking another sip from his glass.   
  
The situation couldn’t get much more uncomfortable than this. Hermione did not wanted to be here. She wanted to be in her room and surrender to the darkness. It had also been an emotional and exhausting day for her. But here she sat, thrown to the snakes. She could feel Malfoy and Pansys eyes and she hardly dared to move. So she focused on the stars in the sky in hope that time would work fast.   
  
But her heartbeat stopped as Theodore spoke again.”Did you find the book in the library you were looking for sooner?”   
  
In shock, Hermione turned to look at him but his eyes were fixed on his glass. Why would he want to discuss something so intimate here and now? Embarrassed, she cleared her throat. “I wasn’t looking for a  _ specific _ book, if that’s what you thought. I was just  _ browsing _ .”   
  
“Pretty sure you were looking for a  _ specific  _ book, Granger. The one you used to like back in the days. I often saw you standing at this shelf in the past.”   
  
Her throat felt dry, like she just ate a hand full of sand. “If, then it was just coincidence.” Hermione felt betrayed. Why would he risk to expose her?    
  
Theodore turned to look at her. His expression was hard to read. “I never understood what you liked about this  _ book _ at all. I can’t see anything interesting in it.”   
  
An agony overcame her. This was none of his business. This was no ones business. “I don’t know which book you mean, Theodore.” This was the worst. Hermione was sure that Malfoy and Pansy had no idea what they were talking about, but they would also be sure that this is not about books. Her heartbeat speeded with the temptation Malfoys eyes left on her skin.   
  
“I think you know exactly which book I mean, Granger. Nobody who reads it feels good about it. It leaves only pain and destruction on its way.”

Desperate, Hermione struggled for words, but Pansy intervened. “What in Salazars name are you guys talking about?”   
  
“Nothing!” Said Hermione as fast as an expelliarmus charm.   
  
Theodore wasn’t done yet. “Why would you read a book that hurts you and makes you feel sad and worthless?” His voice became louder with every word.  “A book that never gave you anything?” The darkness in his eyes burned and even though he seemed to be calm on the inside, a storm was raging inside of him. Knowing that he had lost his temper he pushed his brown hair back. “Is it because it has a beautiful cover? Is that why you like it so much, Granger?”   
  
Time seemed to evaporate like the morning dew in the first rays of the sun. Countless seconds elapsed before Hermione could think straight. But she found no explanation for Theodore's behavior. Hermione did not dare to turn around to look at Malfoy, even though she wanted to know if he understood what Theodore was talking about. It scared her to death that Theodore risked to expose her. Her voice was low when she answered. “Of course not…”

He shook his head contemptuously. It hurt. Of course it did. But sadly, Hermione could understand why he thought so. Looking back, Malfoy had not been nice to her for a moment. On the contrary, he had used her blood status as an opportunity to humiliate her for years if the opportunity arose.   
  
It wasn’t like Hermione didn’t like him when she first met him, or before they attended Hogwarts. She thought he was nice and kind, but she also thought that about Theodore or Pansy. No, she first felt that something was off when she noticed him in the library in her third year. Sometimes when she sat at her favourite table, enjoying a book, or doing homework, he was sitting at the other end of the room but still perfect for her to see him. He came alone and most of the time he studied too. Hermione was exhausted from using the Time-Turner and she had a hard time to focus on her parchment. The afternoon sun bathed his blond hair in a fiery glow, and when Hermione first noticed that she was staring at him, ten minutes had certainly passed. It was the expression he had when he understood or figured something out. His features lighted up a bit in a way Hermione had never seen him before. It made her curious. She wanted to see more of this.    
  
Somehow she started to keep track with all the little things he did, when he was alone. How he tipped the quill against his chin when he didn’t know what to do or how he pushed his hair back when it fell into his eyes. They way he almost smiled when he understood something that made him think or the way he never flipped a page completely but rested it in the ear before he finally turned to read the next page. Suddenly, there were two Malfoys. The one she saw on the corridor, who mocked and insulted her and the one that studied in silence, a small smile on his lips. And Hermione felt like the Malfoy in the library was her Malfoy. Like she found a site on him only she knew. Sometimes he brought Crab and Goyle or Pansy and Theodore with him but then he was his usual self. He needed to be alone to be comfortable.   
  
From time to time, Hermione thought about approaching him. He was smart and nearly as good in all classes as her and learning together would surely benefit both of them, but she was too afraid to lose him. She was afraid that he would hide this smiling site of him if he knew that someone was watching.    
  
And to be honest, Hermione was fine with him being something like her secret crush in the library as long as she found comfort in it. When Ron and Harry did not talk to her, it was the certainty that she could see him that kept her going. She did not need more than that from him. Not until the Yule Ball.   
  
There was a moment when she came down the stairs to meet Victor when her and Malfoys eyes met. He stood with the Beauxbaton girl he invited as a date until he froze on the spot. It wasn’t just the regular eye contact you have with someone but rather like she was seeing him for the first time. And like he was seeing her for the first time too. His eyes had had an expression similar to the one he had, when he understood something.   
  
Later in the evening, after she fought with Ron over Victor she fled into one of the corridors. She was so frustrated that Ron was angry even though she waited for him to ask her. Hermione sat down on one of the stairs, trying her best not to cry out of anger because she knew it would totally ruin the whole night. Her head rested on her arms, her eyes closed and she tried to breath steady when she felt something against her forehead. As her eyelids flew open she saw a black handkerchief floating in front of her head. Her heart felt light when she turned to look at Ronald but her heartbeat stopped when Draco Malfoy stood at the other side of the corridor. His expression was unreadable and he went away so fast that Hermione was never sure if it really was him she saw that day. Until today, she kept that handkerchief in her secret box.

It was as simple like that but still enough for Hermione to stay awake at night and think about it. She knew it meant nothing to him but she felt like there was a red thread between them.   
  
From then on, everytime Malfoy and his friends insulted her, she felt like it wasn’t the same Malfoy. It was someone who looked like the Malfoy she saw in the library or at the Yule Ball. Everything he said to her was like a brick she used to build a room in her mind, a room in which she locked the memory of him. And most of the time, she was really good at keeping him in his corner.   
  
She had never told Theodore, instead he had figured it out by himself. Hermione never knew how and at which point he noticed it but he made very clear what he thought about it. It was in her sixth year that Theodore suddenly approached her while she was on prefect duty. They rarely spoke to each other anymore. His friends did not want her near and vice versa, so it was a rare opportunity to meet him alone. As fast as her lips turned into a smile as fast did they froze in place when she saw him. “Theodore, are you alright?”   
  
“You need to stop it, Granger.” His voice had sounded sore, like he had screamed before.   
  
Hermione was unsure what to do. She wanted to reach out for him but he seemed almost fragile. “What do you mean?”   
  
“He’s going to kill you.” The words were small and shaky, nearly impossible to hear.   
  
Her heartbeat speeded up. “Who? What are you talking about?”   
  
“You need to stop this childish romance you’re dreaming about. Draco is going to kill you, Hermione.”   
  
The sudden use of her first name and the meaning of his words had felt like someone had tossed a bucket of ice water over her. “I don’t know what-”   
  
“Stop it. I don’t need to hear your excuses.” He had pushed himself away from the wall and came closer, arms crossed in front of his chest. Theodore looked like he had not slept in ages. “You need to stop it, Hermione. Immediately. Or you’re going to die.”   
  
Silence fell over the corridor. Hermione had felt the terror in her veins, the bursting fear of being caught. Hot tears had burned behind her brown eyes, her throat felt like a knife was pushing against it. She knew it was the first rule to keep her guard up at any time, but his approach was too sudden for her t o prepare. Husky and thin were her words when she spoke. “Theodore, what is going on? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”   
  
Forcefully, he had grabbed her shoulders, eyes burning into her. “You need to promise me, that you’ll get over him. Now.”   
  
“D-do you think I didn’t try to forget him?” It was too late, hot tears had fell from her cheeks.   
  
“I think you need to try more, Hermione.” Steady his chest raised up and down. “It was careless of you to visit him in the hospital wing last week. Someone saw you.”   
  
After his fight with Harry, Hermione needed to see him, just once, to check if he had been okay. She knew it was risky, since she had no business there but the force inside of her made her do it, without thinking about the consequences. 

Theodores grip had become tighter. “You need to promise it.” He seemed desperate when she felt how he drew closer before he pulled her into his arms. For a few steps, Hermione staggered before she found solid ground under her feet. His hand found its way into her hair, his check pressed against hers. He whispered into her ear. “Promise it, Hermione.”   
  
And she promised it.  It broke her heart to see Theodore suffer so much. He did not cover the whole story at all but the world was crazy enough that it needed no explanation.   
  
But now, years later, they sat on the stairs talking about the same problem. Wasn’t the Dark Lord defeated? Hermione was not sure at all why it was a big deal after all. She would not tell Malfoy anyway, she had no intentions to get near him. It was him who searched for her in the crowd.   
  
Slowly Hermione stood, looking into the sky before she took a deep breath. “I’m going to bed now. Good night.”    
  
This time, Theodore did not reach out to her. Hermione turned, eyes fixed on the door, not   
a glance to Pansy or Malfoy. The lump in her lungs made it hard for her to breathe. But she just kept going. Just to be as far away from them as possible.   
  


~*~*~   
  


On Monday morning, Hermione sat at her desk and looked at the front page of the Daily Prophet. Skeeter had slaughtered the whole event. Hermione could have lived with the quite freely interpreted quotes, because that was what she had expected. „Heartbroken Hermione Granger is still looking for the love of her life.“ Or „ Her eyes shimmered with tears as she wondered if she would ever marry.“ Pathetic. A few hours letter, Hermione had already received several letters from young candidates willing to marry her to spend her comfort at night.

However, Skeeter also had the audacity to publish pictures of the grieving families. That went too far.

Susan put another stack of letters on her desk. „Y-you seem to be really popular, Miss Granger.“ Her eyes danced around restlessly and she hoped from one leg to the other.

Hermione sighed. „It’s my name that they want, not my person.“

„Oh I don’t think that’s true. I-if you want, I can introduce you to a friend of mine…“ She mumbled with a shy smile. Oh god, did she believe what Skeeter wrote?

„Thank you, Susan but I’m fine. Skeeter totally misunderstood. I am very happy alone.“ She handed her all the letters. „Please dispose them for me.“

Susan’s eyes became so big that Hermione was scared that they would eventually fall out. She quaked. „But there is also this….this interview request from Witch Weekly! You have to do it!“ Aimed, Susan pulled a pink letter from the stack and handed it to her.

Witch Weekly? Maybe that would be her chance to clean up with all the rumors? Would be worth a consideration. „I will think about it.“ Wandlessly she summoned her bag and stood up. „Susan, I have to bring my documents back, I guess I will be back in an hour.“ Another glimpse into her pocket mirror and she was on her way.

She rang the little bell on the reception desk. All documents were ready and her hand went to her neck where her necklace should have been resting. Where had it gone?

Magnolia stepped out of the darkness. Today she wore a pink woman suit and Hermione cursed her fashion sense.

„Oh, Miss Granger! Are you here to bring the borrowed documents back?“ Her smile revealed her white teeth.

Nervously, Hermione stroke a lost strand of hair behind her ear. „Yes, I have been diligent.“ She mumbled. Harry said that she was not Malfoy’s girlfriend but if not, what then? An affair?

„Oh, I have heard so much about your diligence.“ Her long fingers lifted the top pedigree from the stack.

„Really? I didn’t knew that it was worth mentioning.“ Hermione felt nervous. She did not want to talk to the woman Malfoy was sleeping with. Once again her hand made sure that the strand really was back where it belonged.

„Draco told me so much about you while he was at Hogwarts“ Magnolia smirked. Hermione felt a shiver when she said his first name. „You were apparently a real smartass.“

She blinked. Her enunciation surprised Hermione.

„Draco kept telling me how incredibly annoying you were. A real know-it-all“ Magnolia seemed so cheerful and elegant as she verbally punched Hermione in the stomach. „And when I look at what you do now, it does not seem to have changed.“

Hermione stared.

„If he head only told me earlier how uncomfortable he feels in your presence, I would not have told him that he should help you carry these documents.“

Hermione did not want to hear that. She tried to change the subject. „So you didn’t went Hogwarts?“ Her voice sounded strange and sandy.

Magnolia chuckled. The stack just did not want to get smaller. „Of course not. My parents knew that only at Beauxbatons I would learn the correct etiquette to become the wife of a mighty pureblood in the future.“ She spoke like a devil, but looked like an angel. Slowly she raised her gaze and her eyes told Hermione everything. To become the wife of a mighty pureblood. Draco Malfoy’s wife.

How did Hermione ended up here? She felt like a sheep that was killed by the wolf.

Hermione hoped that Magnolia would just look through those miserable documents and stopped talking but she was not done yet. „Poor Draco is so traumatized that he does not know what to do. He has never liked you, but whenever he sees you he feels so sorry for you.“ There was pity in Magnolia’s eyes and Hermione wanted to vomit. „Even now, he still believes that he owes it to you to be nice to you. But Miss Granger, you have to agree with me that he does not deserve to suffer anymore.“

Hermione held her breath as Mangolia touched her hand.

„I ask you not to take advantage of him anymore. Stay away from him. He needs to let the past rest.“ She cried.

What the fuck is going on here, Hermione thought. Hermione took advantage of him? Is that what he told her? What the fuck.

Hermione laughed contemptuously. It became so clear to her. His attempt to become „friends“, his outrage at Flourish and Blotts, his advances. He thought he owed it to her. But he could do nothing about it. He hated her.

Her voice was like thunder. „Are you done?“

Magnolia smiled to herself before adjusting the last document. „Yes. I’m glad you understood, Miss Granger.“

Hermione turned on her heel and raced to the elevator.

She closed the gate and pressed impatiently on the button. „FUCK!“ Her hands grabbed her hair and she felt hot tears pressing against her eyes. Pity. FUCKING PITY. She was so stupid. She was just so stupid. She had lowered her guard and what had she got for it? Theodore was right. Magnolia was right. He had to go back into his corner. She had to bury him before it was too late.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of the first chapters I outlined in my head. <3 I hope you like it!

 

When Hermione returned to her desk the same day, she was completely on autopilot. Higgs leviated a few files to her and said something, but Hermione couldn’t hear her. Slowly, she nodded, her eyes fixed on something in the distance. Her heart was aching.  
  
Later that day she lay on her bed, thinking about everything and nothing at all. The familiar feeling of a lump in her throat, was still there, as was the desire to cry, and she started to wonder, maybe there was only a certain amount of tears you can spend on a person because they just won’t want to flow.  
  
Night and day slowly kissed goodbye as Hermione thought about calling in sick. But she wouldn’t hide or hush. Never. And calling in sick wasn’t something a Golden Girl would do.

It was enough. She no longer wanted pity. Harry, Malfoy, Magnolia, Skeeter and Ron, all of them looked at her as if she was fragile. She was not. She was Hermione Jean Granger and she would show them that she could do better. She didn’t need anyone to pay her attention because he thought he owed it to her.

It was not easy to remember how she had banished Malfoy from her heart once. It had been an advantage that they could not cross each other’s paths in America. But recently he was just everywhere and anywhere at once. So that would not do.

It had also helped her to meet other men. Her relationships had never lasted long, but especially in the beginning the dispersal had been ideal. Maybe she should not have thrown away the letters that had arrived after Skeeter claimed that she was looking for a new man...

She needed to move out. Soon. Theodore and Malfoy were too close. She could not risk meeting him by chance in a place where she felt kind of safe. The lease for one of the apartments she had looked at was already on the way.

The last step was a rubberband around her wrist. Every time she caught herself thinking about him, she just pulled it and snapped it onto her skin. It was only a little twinge but that way she would not forget the pain which these feelings brought with them.

It was time. The interview with Witch Weekly would be a good opportunity to clear her reputation. She asked the journalist for further information and an appointment.

The sun rose above the forest as it was time for Hermione to get ready for work. She got up from her bed and went to the bathroom. Her magical reaction smiled and waved at her, even though the real Hermione could feel that her face was set like stone. She looked into her own hazelnut brown eyes, wondering how much of the girl she used to be was still in there. The girl that scribbled passionately and wild on her parchment, just to carefully transfer everything into her notes later. The girl Victor Krumm asked to go to the Yule Ball with him. The girl that searched for Horcruxes with Harry. The girl that erased the memories of her only living relative.

She could see the resemblance but she could also see the difference. It was the light in her eyes, her now more feminine and mature features, the sadness that was like a screen of mist. The long brown hair on the other side still hung over her shoulders. The hair that she got from her mother. The wild curls she tried to tame over and over again. Steady, she took a deep breath before pulling her wand out. „ _Conscidi_ “ An invisible sword made out of air cut through the room. Hair flew to the ground and Hermione felt so much lighter, so freer. The wild mane had disappeared, instead, her hair just reached to her shoulders. She smiled. That would do.  


~*~*~

This evening, Harry would propose to Ginny. Her smile was still on her lips when she got to work on Tuesday and Susan almost choked on her tea while Maria looked at her with a cheeky grin. With every step, she felt the curls bouncing on her shoulders, giving her a feeling like she was floating. Her now rather short hair gave her a self-confidence Hermione has not felt in ages. Sometimes it was enough to cut off your hair to become a new person.

When she changed her business outfit for an emerald green Scottish plaid skirt, white shirt and her favorite leather jacket, she felt excited. She was a little too late and so she had to run the last few steps to arrive punctual for the kickoff. Harry had filled an entire stand with his friends and Hermione could feel the excitement in the air since the game had already begun. But as she stepped through the curtain, the eyes were not focused on the field but on Hermione.

George Weasley stood from his seat and roared „HERMIONE GRANGER IS BACK IN THE GAME!“ The whole crowd joined in and Hermione laughed loudly. She made a small curtsy before her eyes searched for Harry.

He sat in the front row and beamed at her. Next to him sat Malfoy, as expected. What she had not expected was that Magnolia was with him. She snapped the rubber band, when she looked at him and walked to the seat Harry had kept free for her. He stood up, greeted her with a small kiss on the cheek before examining her.

„You look gorgeous, Hermione! I think I’ve never seen you with such short hair!“

„You like it?“ She felt a little embarrassed and ran her hands through her hair.

„I love it! Please, sit down!“ He pointed to the seat to his left.

Hermione noticed that Malfoy also stood but instead she looked at Magnolia. „Malfoy” She nodded in his direction “Oh, Magnolia, good to see you.“

„Good evening, Miss Granger.“ Magnolia chimed, her eyes hungry.

Hermione knew how to play this game as well. „Oh please, call me _Hermione_ , Magnolia.“ She blinked at Malfoy before she turned away from them. Snap.

Harry resumed his conversation with Malfoy and since it was Quidditch related, Hermione turned to see who was sitting next to her. She beamed. „Oh, Luna! Hello!“

The blond witch turned absently to her. „Oh, good day Hermione, what a pleasure to see you! Are you here for Harry's proposal?“

„Ehm, yes of course! You know, I’m not the biggest Quidditch fan.“ She chuckled while she took her bag in her lap and pulled her current read, Game of Thrones, out. It had never been easy for her to find interest in this game, so she had become used to reading a book until it was over.

„I think the game would be more beginner friendly, if everyone was flying slower. You can hardly recognize anything.“

Hermione smiled widely, Luna had always been a strange girl, but she thought that this was what made her interesting. She noticed how Harry said something to Malfoy that made him laugh out loud. It was weird to see him so carefree, he looked happy. For a second, Hermione thought about the boy, sitting in the libary, bathed in sunbeams. Snap.

Lunas voice danced over the cheering crowd. The players flew over their heads. „Isn’t it unbelievable that Harry and Draco have become such good friends? Thanks to Draco, we also got these great seats!“

Hermione shifted when Luna called him by his first name. When had he become everyone’s darling? „Yes, weird.“ Snap.

According to the noise around them, the match seemed to be exciting, but Hermione couldn’t care less about it, she always thought that it was rather boring. A few places next to Magnolia, Hermione spotted Ronald with a girl that seemed to be his new girlfriend. Hermione stretched but she could not see the face of the caramel-haired witch.

She tried to focus on her book and only closed it when the final whistle resounded. Harry excused himself and Hermione wished him luck on his way. Now things would get excited.

Following the cheers of their friends, the Holic Harpiens had won. She saw Ginny and her teammates cheering on the pitch as Harry suddenly ran towards Ginny over the field. Everyone got up and Hermione went forward to the bracket to see better. She beamed.

Ginnys teammates pushed her into Harrys direction before she clasped her hands over her mouth. Hermione was sure she saw her lips forming „Don’t you dare, Potter!!“, when she signaled that he should get up again. Harry dismounted and dropped to his knees, a shy smile on his lips. In that moment, Hermione knew why Harry was so eager to bring her back to England, why he said he needed her help when in fact she did nothing. She would have regret it, if she missed it. Hermione felt the happiness bursting inside her and from the corner of her eyes, small tears started to fall. She clutched the railing and pushed forward to get a better view. Several people joined her and they roared and cheered together when Harry finally said the most important four words of his life. Joy filled her heart and lungs as she clapped and cheered for her friends, when a tickle made her turn her head to the right, where she looked directly into Malfoy’s eyes.

The time had stopped. Everyone around her cheered and roared. But she had only eyes for him. There were already a few people standing between them but it was like they didn’t matter at all. Snap. It didn’t work. She could not solve her gaze. Snap. He smiled and butterflies fluttered wildly. SNAP. The pain pulled her back and she was breathing heavily when she saw Ginny in Harry's arms. 

Fast, she tried to regain focus as Harry pulled Ginny closer and kissed her passionately, like the whole world wasn’t watching at all, just like he kissed her so long ago in the Gryffindor common room after they won their match against Slytherin. Her hands clasped the bracket. The stadium was out of whack when Harry slipped the ring Mrs. Frey made for him on Ginny’s finger. The air seemed so thin. She applauded. She smiled.

Ginny and Harry kissed and kissed, while Ginny's teammates doused them with a bubbly shower. Someone tapped her shoulder and her heartbeat stopped.

„Are we going down to the field, Hermione?“ Luna smiled at her.

Hermione found her breath again, „Yes, let’s go!“ Just far away from him.

The whole group made their way down and Hermione made sure that she and Luna were always on the front so she didn’t had to see Malfoy and or with Magnolia.

When Hermione embraced Harry, tears came to her. She was so happy for them and he laughed when she throw herself in his arms. “I wish you to be the most happiest husband and wife in the world. You know that, right?”

Harry smiled into her hair. “Of course I do. Thank you, Hermione.”  
  
Hermione kissed him on the cheek before she turned to Ginny and started to scream like a little girl when Ginny showed her the ring.

„I can’t believe all of you knew about it and no one told me!“ Ginny sulked before she went silent. „WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR, HERMIONE?????“

Hermione laughed heartily „Well….surprise??“ It was the first time in a while that her heart felt light again. She wanted to be happy and she wanted to feel good tonight. Screw Malfoy. Snap.

The entire event moved into a hall that belonged to the stadium. Ginny had disappeared into the dressing room to change her outfit and Harry was overwhelmed with congratulations.

„Hermione, Hermione…what did my brother just let slip through his fingers?“ George Weasley stood next to her and sipped on a firewhiskey.

She had always liked him very much. He was light, like her new hairstyle. „Well yes, tell me George, what is it?“

He made a sweeping gesture all over her body and Hermione chuckled. „You look beautiful. Bad luck for him, luck for us other men.“

„Bad for you that I know that you’re engaged to Angelina!“ She frowned at him, a smile on her lips.

„Damn it! Can Ginny never shut up?“ He pouted and Hermione could only shake her head. But her laugh died as she realized that Malfoy had joined them. Suddenly, he shook hands with George and the two men greeted each other with a laugh. Like friends.

„George, it’s good to see you, how is the business doing?“ His smile was honest and he looked a lot younger than usual.

That would be uncomfortable. Snap.

„Perfect, I can’t complain! The financial plan you sent us was totally profitable. Even Ron had to admit that we could save a bunch of money with it“ George was also trapped by Malfoy. Great.

„I’m glad that I could help. If you like, we can make another appointment and discuss how we could improve your marketing.“ His whiskey glass found its way to his lips and Hermione would have sacrificed an arm to pull her gaze away from them. Snap.

„For real? There are still a few ideas that I would like to implement!“ Hermione had not known that the two had a business relationship. To be honest, Hermione had no idea what Malfoy was doing for a living.

Malfoy laughed and Hermione felt lighter. Snap. „Just make an appointment with my assistant. Your business has great potential on the market!“

George looked like a kid on Christmas. „Yes! That would be bloody wicked! I have to ask Ron when we can set it up!“ He started to walk away and Hermione wanted to scream. No, no, no, please don’t leave me alone with him! But she only smiled weirdly and looked into the other direction.

„You cut your hair.“ His voice felt close. Snap.

She felt warm. „Shouldn’t you be with your girlfriend right now?“

„She’s not my girlfriend.“ His voice was gentle and he came a little closer. Why does he always have to come closer.

„I don’t care.“ Liar. Snap. The bitterness in her voice was obvious.

His pleasing smile was even audible. „Are you jealous?“

„Yes. I am.“ Finally, she turned to look at him. His blue eyes were burning into her. „Yes, I am jealous but not for your girlfriend, but for you.“

He raised an eyebrow. „Pardon?“

„I’m jealous of the life you’re living. I’m jealous that it’s so easy for you to befriend everyone. I’m jealous that you moved on while I’m still stuck.“

He chuckled before he took a sip from his glass. When he set it down his smile was gone. Hermione felt a tingle. Snap. „You seem to have distorted perceptions.“

„I don’t think you can judge that.“ Without hesitation, she turned her head away, hoping he would understand that their conversation was over now.

It made her flesh crawl as he took a string from her hair and his fingertips touched her face lightly. His voice was so quiet that only Hermione could hear him. „He was right, you really look beautiful.“

Slowly her head turned back to him and his face was closer than before. Her first reflex should have been to knock his hand away. But somehow it felt so sweet. Hopefully no one watched. She looked up at him under her eyelashes and noticed that he took a sharp breath. His face did not reveal what he thought, the mask was perfect. Did he take it off when he was alone with Magnolia? Could she see what lay behind it? But anyway, who does he think is he is? Running around giving women compliments when he’s obviously in company.

It would have been too noticeable to pull on the rubber band right now. She was screwed.

He cleared his throat. „My mother is still gone and she probably won’t be back soon, I’m sorry that until then you can’t continue your research.“ Slowly he dropped the strand and as he looked after it, their eyes met. She longed for him. She needed to snap.

Something crossed his face and he pulled away when Magnolia slipped her arm through his. „Draco Darling, there you are! And Mrs. Granger, I mean _Hermione,_ is with you as well. Perfect.“

Her disappointment was great, but near Magnolia he had someone else he could annoy. She saw the muscles in his jaw tense. Hermione could have sworn that he looked upset for a moment. Like Magnolia had disturbed him at something.

Suddenly Hermione felt her mobile phone vibrating. She always had it with her, an old habit.  Absent-minded, she pulled it out of her pocket. It was a message from Matthew, asking if she would like to come to California for the weekend. As she wondered if she was free, she met the disgusted look of Magnolia.

„What kind of witchcraft is _that_?!“ She boomed.

Hermione was confused. Fuck. „Uhm, it’s just my mobile phone…“

Magnolia looked like she had drunk turned milk. „A mobile what?“

It was a little embarrassing. „It's a muggle invention to speak with someone or to send letters without owls.“ She glanced at Malfoy who at her surprise did not looked disgusted but amused. Secretly and nimble, she put the mobile back in her bag.

„These little Muggle inventions are scary.“ She pulled closer to Malfoy. „Anyway, Harry is looking for the two of you, they want to take a picture with their _closest_ friends.“ She gave Malfoy a seductive smile which he didn’t noticed since his eyes were still on Hermione.

She broke his gaze. „Okay, I’ll go ahead.“ Her smile didn't reached her eyes. Fuck. Snap. Snap. Snap.

A young photographer was already setting up the people. Harry and Ginny stood on a pedestal in the middle. Hermione rolled her eyes when she saw that Ron was there too.

Critically, the photographer looked at his constellation before he noticed Hermione. „Miss Granger, please you stay next to the youngest Weasley brother.“

Why, Merlin? Why? She sighed and went, without looking at Ron for once.

„Oh and Mr. Malfoy you stand next to Mrs. Granger!“ With a little smirk on his lips Malfoy stood next to her. A little too close for her taste.

This will probably not be her favourite photo. She did not know what was worse. Ronald to her left or that she could feel Malfoy’s body to her right. He smelled wonderful. Snap. It took half an eternity until the photographer had placed everyone. Then he began to adjust the light and Hermione sighed. Somehow a spontaneous snapshot seemed more appropriate…

It was not until Malfoy whispered in her ear that Hermione felt something in her heart move. „I’m sorry about what I said to you, Granger.“

She shivered and tried not to move her face. His voice was low and like drugs to her. „I really didn’t meant it.“

Hermione’s eyes searched for Magnolia and her blood froze when she found her eyes in the crowd. Snap. She was not watching, she stared. Hermiones eyes rested on Magnolia and she moved her lips barely. „It's okay, you do not have to apologize to me.“ It hurt.

The photographer was desperately tugging at a soft box and the light began to flicker heavily. Malfoy’s hand found it’s way over her lower back to her waist, she felt his chest at her shoulder. Why did he do that? His touch made her skin burn and she almost went up in flames. Snap. She wanted to get away but it felt so good. It went dark for a few seconds and the group began to mutter and laugh. She could almost feel his lips against her ear. „There’s something I need to tell you, Granger“ His smell enlivened all her senses. Snap.

Her words were only a whisper. Her breath was heavy. „We're talking right now.“

„No, I have to talk to you alone.“ She felt him holding his breath. What kind of game was that?

She looked at him. It was still a bit dark and she couldn’t see him properly. Her eyes went to his lips. Fuck. Snap. This was not good. She was not allowed to relapse again. Not again. The first flash started and Hermione startled. No. No picture on which she looked at him. No picture on which one could guess what she longs for. She took a deep breath and turned left.

„Ronald, would you mind if we swap places?“

Ron turned to her and smiled. „Of course not ‚Mione!“

Malfoy's hand left her back and she could feel his tension. She took a step forward to make space for Ron before she stood on his place. The photographer looked desperate. She gave Ron a tight smile. He could have said no. „You look really pretty, Mione!“ He beamed.

She frowned a him „Too soon, Ronald.“

Her eyes flickered at Malfoy and she saw him tense his jaw. His brain working. Next she looked at Magnolia, who smiled contentedly and nodded slowly, barely visible.

She gave the camera a happy smile. The fact that she escaped Malfoy was a start. But just because you’re clean does not mean you won’t miss it.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her eyes searched the people in the great hall, fast scanning every face. With every face she saw her heartbeat got faster and with every beat her steps got faster as well. Alive. Alive. Alive. Alive. She wanted to stop because she wished she didn’t cared. But she cared so much she couldn’t stop herself. She cared so much that she didn’t noticed that she was running. She cared so much that it felt likes hours before she finally found him. He was just standing there his back to her. He tensed and turned, no expression on his face. But his eyes found hers and it felt like her blood was boiling. Draco Malfoy was alive and she didn’t knew if she was relived or disappointed.
> 
> AU. Hermione was born as a halfblood but after her father died she had to life with her muggle uncle. Her childhood friends abandoned her after she was sorted into Gryffindor and she befriended a boy named Harry Potter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me a while to update! I'm really busy atm with personal stuff but I'm still working on this though :)

„As I said before, Matthew, I really can’t come to California at the moment.“ Hermione walked around her room, mobile phone in one hand while picking things up and tucking them in a moving box with the other. She did not move back to England with a lot of stuff but her papers alone filled an entire box. It was Matthew’s sixth attempt to invite her and the seventh time she said that she couldn’t come at the moment.

„I _have_ to move next weekend. If you really miss me that much, why don’t _you_ come over and help me?“ Matthew was persistent. He really wanted her to visit him but she was too busy.

Anyway, she had to smile. „Listen Matthew, I would love to come and enjoy a bit of the sun, but first I really have to move into my new apartment and even if I came for just a day, the jet lag would kill my entire sleeping pattern and it’s far too expensive to buy a port-key for a one day trip.“ Her hand on her hip, she stopped in the middle of the room. Someone knocked. Her eyes flickered to the door.

„I have to hang up now but I’ll get back in touch soon! Don’t forget to check if I left my necklace at your place, okay? Bye!“ She threw the mobile phone onto the bed and crossed her arms over her chest. „Come in!“ She called.

Slowly, Theodore pushed the door open and stepped into Hermione’s new, soon-to-be-gone room. He had one hand casually tucked into the pocket of his pants. There was something awkward about the situation, Hermione hadn’t talked with Theodore since that night on the terrace and she was still rather offended.

She saw how his larynx jumped up and down. „You really want to move out, huh?“ His hand slid over the wood of the door frame, like he could trace an old memory while doing so.

Hermione tried to look busy and so her hands had taken on the task of picking up all the books as carefully and slowly as possible.

„This place holds too many memories…I need a fresh start.“ She pushed her hair back and noticed how she was still not quite used to it being so much shorter now.

„You mean too many memories of Draco?“

Her blood froze in her veins. Unsure, she shifted her weight from one foot to another. “Theodore, I-”

“I just really don’t understand it, Granger.” She felt his eyes on her, but she couldn’t look at him. “Don’t you have a spark of dignity?”  
  
She threw the books from her hand in a box and turned to look at him, arms again crossed in front of her chest. “I don’t know what you’re trying to say.”

„You can’t fool me, Granger.“  He was tense.

It was hard to keep her breathing steady and Hermione knew she was nearly killing him with her eyes. “Get to the point, Theodore.” She wasn’t in the mood to fight. Especially not over Draco Malfoy.

Theodore had always been loyal to Malfoy. He had  always been in his clique, always by his side. Even though he hadn’t laughed with them when they made fun of her or when Malfoy hexed her in class, he had been with them. He not even once stood up for her. Who was he to tell her what to do?

His footsteps echoed through the silence as he approached her. „You need to stop this, Granger.”  Quickly, he grabbed her wrist and with a brisk move he tore the rubber apart. “This game you’re playing is dangerous.” The words were like poison, running through her veins, humming in her blood.

“This is none of your business.” She pulled her wrist free and looked at the red mark, the only thing it left behind.  
  
“It is.”  
  
“What do you want to hear, Theodore?”  
  
“I just want to understand. After everything he did, after every time he hurt you. What do you see in him?”  
  
It was quiet for a long moment until Hermione sighed and turned away. “I’m telling you, there’s nothing to to understand.” She looked out of the window to the forest, and truly, she would miss this view.  
  
“Don’t you want some happiness in your life?” Theodore’s voice was dry and quiet. “Don’t you think that after everything, you might deserve to be happy?”  
  
He made it sound like happiness was an option. Something you choose. But happiness has to choose you. Not the other way around.  
  
For Hermione, Theodore was something similar to family. He was the cousin you see once in a while, and even though you never talk about private or intimate things, you have a certain kind of closeness that is so unique that friendship can never convey it. You would never tell him that you like a man you should hate, for reasons you can’t explain and he would never judge you for longing for something simple can’t have. This was the kind of relationship Hermione had in mind, when she thought about Theodore, but what happened then was the complete opposite.  
  
The silence was breaking through the room and only when Theodore turned and walked to the door, Hermione felt like there was enough oxygen to breath again. „I’ll ask Lil’ to help you pack, Granger.“

~*~*~

It was already late in the afternoon when Hermione stood outside the office of her supervisor Helena Higgs. She had to push harder. Her last cases had been nothing but trivialities. Hermione wanted something serious, she wanted to change something. She knew that there were many cases that needed her service and she was ready for them. Hermione would prove it to them.

Higgs was a really tall woman with short ginger hair. Her hairstyle was one of a kind, it looked liked someone had taken a pot, pulled it over her forehead and then cut around it. This woman was a victim of the ministry. She had that aura Hermione knew from many women who had wanted to make a career, but were kept on the leash by influential men.

As Hermione sat down on the visitor’s chair, Higgs nervously played around on of her over-sized gold earrings. „So, Miss Granger, you wanted to talk to me?“

„Yes, I would like to accept a new, somewhat challenging case.“ Hermione had picked one of her more formal work outfits for today, hopefully the more conservative Higgs liked it.

„As far as I know, you’re still dealing with two complaints from the magical transport department.“

„No, I actually submitted my reports last week.“

Higgs looked up, startled. „You did?“

„Yes.“

Immediately, the older witch started to check all papers on her desk. And there were a lot of those.

„Mrs Higgs, I really don’t want to complain but I’ve been on duty for a few weeks now and I’d like to take on a more serious case…“

„If you don’t want to complain, then why are you doing it?“

Hermione swallowed. „Because I’m capable of more and that’s why I’ve accepted this position.“

„Miss Granger, I know as a part of the Golden Trio and as a famous war heroine you’re used to get what you want but I don’t see you working on a major case in the near future.“

Her eyebrows flinched. „Excuse me, Mrs Higgs, but I worked for the MACUSA in the last couple of years. From my assessment, you can see that I already had far more difficult cases to deal with!“

Higgs sighed and massaged her temples. „Alright. I don’t want to argue with you, Miss Granger. And I don’t have a desire for Kingsley to come visit me later and ask me why I did not give his darling what she asked for.“ She began to pull out the bottom file of a pile and Hermione already saw all files fall to the floor.

„It’s a complaint of a young lady against the Ministry. The defender is a tough nut. Make him realize that he has no chance.“

Thankfully, Hermione reached for the file. That sounded good. But before she could grab it, Higgs pulled it back.

„When you’re done with it, I expect a detailed report. I don’t accept that this case faces the Wizengarmot. Roger that?“

„Sure.“ Justice seemed to be written in such a tiny font that it was barely visible anymore.

She closed the door to Mrs. Higgs’ office and sighed. Hermione was pissed. What was her bloody problem?! She had processed almost twice as many complaints and applications as she had been assigned to do. She had given everything. Ridiculous.

Annoyed, she stamped through the hallways back to her desk as someone stood in her way.

„Hermione, how good to see you! You’ve changed your hair, I love it!“

She had to blink to get rid of her anger in front of her eyes. Standing in front of her was Parvati Patil, a black briefcase over her shoulder, dressed in a dark green pantsuit. „Oh, hello, Parvati! What brings you here?“ Kisses on the left, kisses on the right.

„Oh, I’m here with my boss, I was looking for-„ She stopped when a magical memo stopped over her head and dropped itself into her hand. Carefully she opened it and read the words. „Oh, I was looking for you.“ Parvati smirked.

„Me?“ Hermione frowned.

„Seems like it. I actually came here to tell this goat Higgs that we would notify her to the Council of Elders if she did not start our case slowly. But seems like you are now responsible.“ Her perfectly manicured nails opened the clasp of her bag. She exchanged the memo for a small calendar. „Since we’ve been waiting for a long time for a hearing, would it be fine if we met for lunch later to talk about the details? Or do you need more time?“

She was baffled. „I don’t quite understand…What do you have to do with that?“ Hermione tried to remember what Parvati had said. What was her job again?

Parvati chuckled and flipped her unbelievably shiny hair over her shoulder. „My boss is the defender of Liliet Everness, the applicant.“

„Oh…what a coincidence.“

„I don’t believe in coincidences. So, lunch? Will you have had enough time for preparations by then?“

Her eyes glanced from Parvati to the file in her arms. When she looked back at her, there was a spark in Hermione’s eyes. „Definitely!“

„Excellent!“ Parvati opened her calendar and summoned a short quill. „My boss and I await you at 3 p.m at Chaudiére!“ Gracile, she put everything back into her bag and gave her a charming smile.

„Uhm, okay. What’s the name of your law firm? Or your boss?“ Research was half a battle. Hermione liked to know who she was dealing with.

Parvati chuckled again. „I’m so sorry, I can’t tell you yet.“

„Why not?“

She winked and turned, her hand shot up  above her hand as she waved at Hermione. „See you at lunch!“

What was that?

~*~*~

The case was far more obvious than Hermione had hoped. As far as Hermione knew the complainant, Miss Everness, had filled a complaint after the Ministry refrained from prosecuting. Miss Everness claimed she had been drugged and raped after a meeting with a certain Ben Beech. The ministry report, however, said that Miss Everness had agreed to sex and even had had a romantic relationship with Beech. Word against word.

Her heels clattered over the paved stones as she hurriedly climbed the steps of the Chaudiére. The hostess led her to the back of the restaurant and Hermione marveled. The Chaudiére had a French vintage flair and beautiful chandeliers filled the room with dim light. Hermione had to wonder why someone would choose such a fancy place for a business meeting. This was some serious pureblood shit. No, she had no problem rebelling against an old, conservative gentleman who did not take her seriously because of her blood status. She would not lose and she would not be intimidated by such an expensive ambience. The hostess stopped in front of a door that seemed to lead to a separate table and Hermione saw Parvati. She felt a smile spreading on her lips but it froze when she noticed who sat opposite to her. She wanted to cry.

Without hesitation, Parvati rose from her chair, a mischievous grin on her face. „Hermione, please sit down.“

Hermione wasn’t looking at her, her gaze was fixed on the blond mop of hair. In slow motion she saw how he stood up and buttoned his jacket before he turned to face her. This can’t be. Just how unlucky could a person be?

She tried to find her voice. „Malfoy…I did not know you were a lawyer.“

„Well, that was the point. I have several jobs, lawyer being just one of them. Sit down.“ He gestured to the chair Parvati had sat on while Parvati sat down next to him.

She was confused. Really confused. She pulled the file out of her bag but she couldn’t remember what she wanted to say…“So you’re working for Malfoy, Parvati“ She needed to snap but Theodore had torn the rubber.

Parvati rested her head on her hands. „Yes, Draco is my Boss.“

„Wow…you’re a boss.“ Hermione looked at the file. This was so weird.

Parvati and Malfoy exchanged a glance.

„I am amazed that Theodore really did not tell you“ Malfoy's voice sounded like a purring cat.

„He knew?!“

„Yes, he’s also working for me.“ He was boasting. Hermione could see his smug grin without looking at him. He had played a game and won. Great.

„Is he also a lawyer?“ Why did she have to ask him that? Why had Hermione never asked Theodore directly?

„He is a consultant. My company offers a diversity of services. Defense, consulting, investigation, research. These kinds of things.“ Malfoy enjoyed every word as if it was a delicacy. Hermione’s mind was racing. Malfoy had his own company? When did that happen?

Hermione nodded and the waitress came back to take their order. Hermione was not hungry anymore, because that was clearly too much information at once. Who else was working for him? „Just a coffee for me, please.“

The hostess nodded and Hermione avoided looking at Malfoy.

„You’re not going to eat anything?“  He frowned.

She began to flick the file around. What was it she wanted to talk about? What was the case about? „I’m not hungry.“

„You have to eat. We all take the Caesar salad. An earl grey tea for me and a sparkling water.“ He turned to Parvati. „Is that fine for you?“

Parvati nodded and gave him a charming smile before she started to write something in her notebook. Hermione’s eyes flickered. She seemed so professional. Both of them seemed so professional. Hermione was surprised. She felt like she had missed something. As if everyone had received an important memo and only she did not.

„About Miss Everness. You can imagine Granger, that it is really hard for her that her case was dismissed without further investigation.“

Hermione was lost in her thoughts and had a hard time to concentrate. Suddenly, she remembered his hand on her back.

„Of course, she had agreed to sleeping with Beech. But, as we have said from the beginning, our client was under the influence of a strong love potion.“ Parvati gave him a document that looked like a report. „The healers at St Mungo’s have confirmed that Amortentia was found in her blood.“

Hermione took the report out of his hand and read the results of the examination. „And the Ministry has dismissed your claim anyway?“ There was no word about Amortentia in her papers.

He raised an eyebrow. „Obviously. That’s why we’re here.“

Tricky situation. Did someone miss it? But her eyes stumbled as she saw the date of the report. „This report is only a few days old. Was your accusation not already a month ago? Then this document wasn’t available at all?“

„Yes, that’s true. We have had this report subsequently made. However, the responsible healer has been able to confirm that the potion has been in her blood for a long time.“ His voice was composed and set.

„Why wasn’t it done directly? And what should mean „for a long time?“ Is there an exact timeframe?“ She build momentum. There were too many discrepancies. The report should have been made immediately, the more time passed, the more unstable was this proof.

„We weren’t able to test it at the time being.“ He said and Parvati handed him another document that he laid down in front of her.

This case was too easy. „So your complaint is backed up by a report that should have been done a month ago and that neither confirms that Miss Everness was really drugged at the time of crime, nor if it was really Beech who gave her the potion and that he was the one she was poling on?“ But when she uttered the words, she felt the voice of reason in the back of her head.

The hostess arrived with their food and drinks. Parvati placed her napkin on her lap after she finished writing her last sentence.

Hermione felt no appetite and so she pushed her plate aside. In her file was a statement that she found particularly relevant. Malfoy and Parvati started to eat.

„Beech told the Ministry that Miss Everness had some sort of obsession with him. Witnesses have even watched her waiting in front of his work place.“

„Eat, Granger.“ He commanded.

She chuckled. You can command your staff but don’t dictate me, Hermione thought. „I’m not hungry.“

He dropped his fork and patted his mouth with his napkin before he looked at her. She focused on the documents in front of her.

„Listen, I think it’s funny that you believe everything the Ministry tells you, but we need to clarify a few facts.“ His long finger pointed to one of the papers. „Everness was heavily pregnant at the time of crime. She was pregnant from her fiancé. Therefore it was not possible for us to test her directly. Her magic simply protected the child and her from every charm that wasn’t her own.“

Hermione could feel her chest tighten. Who would rape a pregnant woman? And she was engaged? There was nothing about that in her file.

„It is true that Everness had ambushed him. But only because he had harassed her younger sister several times and she wanted to confront him.“

Quickly, she took the document in her hand and searched for something comparable. Nothing. The reporting was totally one-sided.

Meanwhile, Draco had already brought out the next piece of evidence. Parvati ate with pleasure and watched intently.

„This is a list of 20 woman who claim to have been poisoned with Amortentia by Beech in the last couple of years. It’s the same procedure every time“

„Did you present that?“ Her heart slipped into her stomach.

„Of course, but they did not care.“ For a short moment she saw how his eyes burned. He was winning.

„Why were these women not interviewed as witnesses?“ Whoever handled this case had obviously acted sloppily and voraciously.

Malfoy chuckled and leaned back. „Because that would bring another problem to light.“ He looked at her as if he wanted her to solve the puzzle on her own.

Her thoughts raced and suddenly it clicked in Hermione’s brain. „Why Amortentia is open to the public at all.“

Parvati and Malfoy both grinned, satisfied.

„The Ministry has been turning a blind eye on this for years. Ignoring every complaint, pushing back every trial.“ His fork picked into a cherry tomato. He almost seemed bored.

„But why?“ This was horrible. She had thought the times of corruption were over.

„It is a market that brings money to the people and those who have money can support the Ministry.“ Their eyes met for a second and she felt her heart pound.

This was wrong. She thought she was standing on the side of justice. „We will resume the investigations.“ Her voice was hard and set. This was so wrong. The Ministry was not allowed to look away just because someone with a little money wanted to keep it quiet. It was not fair.

Hermione had to blink as Parvati spoke „Higgs won’t let that happen.“ She had completely forgotten that the young witch was there.

„I’ll persuade her, otherwise I'll talk to Kingsley. I want this case checked out exactly.“

Malfoy licked his lips and Hermione wished she had not seen it. Her cheeks got hot.

„It’s really unfortunate that you're are now the minister's lapdog.“ He began to eat again.

Hermione laughed heartily. „I’m not his-„

„You have not even shown a little bit of empathy. Did you just think for a moment that Everness might really be the victim?“

Anger rose in her. „I was going to-„

„You believed the truth they showed you without even questioning what’s in these documents.“

She stopped and blinked. She really had believed the Ministry was right. But this was exactly her job, wasn’t it? And the next question was, did she want that to be her job? She barely had time to prepare! And of course she assumed that the Ministry had seriously investigated this case! It was her job to prevent a lawsuit. To save money. She had never thought this would happen at the cost of justice. Hermione was searching for words.

He smirked and Hermione felt reminded of the boy who grinned complacently during potion classes, when her diligence made sure that Snape withdrew points. „Amazing, this is the first time I see you speechless. How pleasant.“ He turned to look at Parvati who started to pack her things.

She wanted to fight him. To tell him that he’s wrong and that he’s the one without empathy. But she felt as if she had just lost this battle. „There is a lot I want to say but these are all things that are a bit inappropriate.“

He laughed loud and it was such an angelic sound that Hermione shivered.

„Here is my business card. Report to Parvati if you need more information.“ He stood up and Parvati followed on the spot. “This one’s on me”, he said and put some bills on the table he had taken out of his wallet. „And if Higgs wants to fire you, we can surely find a spot for you in the cleaning crew.“ Their eyes met and her jaw dropped as he winked at her. He seemed as good-humored as Hermione has never seen him.

When he and Parvati were already standing in the doorway, she heard his voice dancing over, „And do not forget to eat.“

She grimaced and mimicked him before she pulled the plate closer and started eating. Fuck. Quandary. Higgs had made it clear to her that this case should not go to court. It can not go to court because it would anger the wrong people. She was supposed to make them shut up but now she kind of teamed up with them…

Unbelievable how good Malfoy was in presenting his position factually. He had been prepared and could refute all her arguments without effort. Hermione groaned and dropped the fork. Now she had eaten anyway. She drew the documents closer and frowned. She needed another coffee. And an idea.


End file.
